Tuesday, June 5, 2012

"Tell your Emotions to SHUT UP"


It's time to attack this area. We have struggled in this area and our emotions and little feelings have been running our life for WAY too long! Today. We're putting the smackdown on our emotions. We can no longer afford to sit & entertain our feelings as they just go with the wind. YOUR LIFE can not be determined by HOW you feel!! How does that work??! At SOME point we have to TELL our emotions WHAT to do.

Let me be honest, as most of you know from my story-- that I was a train wreck. I was an emotional little mess. I loved to manipulate my little ex boyfriends when I was single with my emotions. I would cry if I didn't get my way, I would whine, or seduce them to get what I wanted and then roll my eyes & think "you idiot." Yeah, I was wrong-- crazy & without Christ. Even WITH Christ-- I still hadn't renewed my thinking in that area. That crap even tried to creep up into my courting relationship with Cornelius when we started courting. When we first started courting, I wanted my way. I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it and if you didn't give it to me-- I was going to have an attitude. You better believe Cornelius was gonna feel it. I got what I wanted.
 One weekend, I was having a rough week at work and I just wanted to get away. Back in the day, if I had a rough day-- I would book a flight and go somewhere to GET away. Yes, I ran from my problems. So, I already had a flight booked to visit Cornelius in about 3 weeks but I didn't care, I was going to Atlanta that weekend. So- I called him & said, I'm coming this weekend. I need to get away. He said, "No you're not"-- I'm like WHY!??! He was like, "We agreed that you were coming in 3 weeks and  why would that change if you're having a bad day?" And I'm like "LOOK Negro, I'm coming because I want to see my boyfriend and I want to GET away-- like NORMAL couples-- what the heck is wrong with you??" And he stood his ground. He said, "We don't make emotional decisions because we have a rough day, we don't run from our problems.."  ooohhhhhhhhhh ,I was HEATED! How was HE gonna tell me what to do?! Is he crazy? I'm fly. He must have not got the memo. After we hung up the phone.. I continued to search for flights.. I was gonna go SOMEWHERE. Then..

I sat, frustrated and started to cry as the Lord spoke to me. He said "Heather, you always run from your problems as if quickly changing your geographical location is going to fill your voids.. it may fill them temporarily but I desire to fill all of your heart, I know that you're having a rough week but I was there all along, I want your entire heart Heather. Stop trying to use humans and things to make you feel good about yourself. It's time to grow up. I stopped in my tracks... "But Lord, I hate these feelings in my heart, I hate that work stressed me out, I hate that Cornelius won't let me get my way, I'm frustrated Lord!! You have to help me!!" He whispered, "What else makes you mad?".. well, I'm frustrated about.. this.. & that. He said.. "I desire for you to be content in every way & in every area. This is a good start. Pour your heart out to me daily and stop carrying all of that care. When you spend time with me, don't make it a law or a "check" on your wall of your good deeds, spend time and enjoy me freely. I desire a relationship with you. My child, I love you. I dance over you with singing-- I knew you long before you were in your mothers womb and I called you for a purpose. We are going to get through these areas together. My grace is sufficient for you. My strength is perfected in your weakness."  I responded.. "Daddy, I'm so sorry. I repent. This issue is greater than me wanting to get away.. it was a chance for me to fill YOU with yet another person, thank GOD Cornelius stuck to his word & pushed me towards you Lord-- Daddy, I am going to work on this but I just need your help. I cannot deal with these emotions by myself, I need YOUR help. I'm lost and nothing without you Daddy."
3 weeks after with my hubby for our "planned" trip! Was worth the wait!

That DAY was a turning point for me. I realized that I was an emotionally led woman. No longer was I going to try to manipulate Cornelius with my emotions or others. I was determined to grab ahold of them. This is when I begin to tell my emotions to shut up. This is when I went hard against Satan's attacks & foreboding thoughts. This is a DECISION. When your co-worker is poppin' off at the mouth-- you don't have to respond with the same drama! Respond in LOVE. Smile, tell your emotions to hush & "win people over with your quiet & gentle spirit"- (1 Peter 3:4). If your husband or boyfriend is off the chain-- respond differently. Don't be that overly emotional woman or man. Nobody will want to be AROUND you. You want to be LOVED & not TOLERATED. If you ALWAYS have some drama going on around you, it makes it HARD for people to be themselves with you, worrying that they will "say " the wrong thing as they walk on eggshells around you. And if others around you are overly emotional-- LOVE never fails. So don't entertain it. Don't give into the attention and remember that whatever you FED will only GROW. If you continue to FEED an emotional person, they will continue to manipulate others with their emotions. Shut it down. You cannot change others, but you can change YOU. God wants your HEART.


I always like to include just a few practical tips.-- HOW to tell your emotions to SHUT UP!

1. Tell your emotions to shut up often. If you feel them rising up, check yourself.
2. Do a quick "emotion" check-- meaning that if you're upset-- slow down, analyze the situation. Ask yourself if you have a REAL reason to be UPSET or are you just being emotional. Judge yourself quickly before you run & make a decision to "confront" somebody with MORE emotions.
3. Mind your business. Half the time you're ready to pop off on someone is because of the way they "Treated someone else"-- God fights our battles. Words are powerful & they hurt LONG after the fight is over.
4. Spend crazy time with God. THIS will NEVER change. You will be less likely to pop off on someone if you're spending regular time with God. The whole goal is to SPEND time in His word & APPLY it. You should be meditating on scriptures & using those as ammo throughout your day. Join the journal challenge! This will help greatly!
5. Stop hanging with messy, overly emotional people. IF you have a ton of super emotional friends or you watch a ton of emotional Basketball wives TV shows.. what else do you think is going to come OUT of your heart??! You planted drama, you'll harvest more drama.

It's easy for you to argue & fight with everyone. It take a STRONG women to control her emotions. God wants to be able to TRUST you. Can HE?!


Before I close, just a reminder that I'm introducing Pinky Promise's first ring. If you purchase any two items off of www.heatherlove.bigcartel.com then you can type in "CROSSRING"  as a discount and we'll ship you one for free. 100% of the proceeds this week goes to our missions trip to Ethiopia August 13th. We'll be out there feeding the homeless, preaching, laying hands on the sick and helping at the orphanage. Here's a picture of the ring.





God LOVES you like crazy,


29 comments:

  1. Hi Heather, the Holy Spirit is constantly telling me to chill out and simmer down. I am a dramatic person and very hyper at times. My high energy can really wear my husband, kids, family and friends out. So this post was designed by God for me through you. I pray for you and Cornelius all the time. I thank God for creating you, you remind me of myself. Thank you for allowing God to use you. Your telecasts are right on time for me. I listen to them at work and your words are constant reminders of God's plan for our lives. As always, great great post.

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  2. MY GOD....This is so on time for me. I was literally thinking about running away this week. This post has checked me in so many areas. Again Thank you Heather for letting God use you in a major way. You have absolutely no idea how your posts are helping me to grow as a young woman of God and increasing my desire for an even closer relationship with God. I really appreciate you and how God is using you!Thank you so much!

    *No longer running :-)*

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  3. I thank God for you and your husband Ms. Heather. Your testimonies, your relationship with God have helped me to realize some things about myself that I hadn't before. My emotions have torn my marriage apart. I was unable to shut up and allow God to be in control and it drove my husband away. We're still married but living apart. It took him leaving for me to realize that I was out of control. Reading your post is already changing the way I look at situations in my life. Keep doing Gods work. You are truly blessed.

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  4. This is so true Heather! I think its so easy for us to get all caught up in our feelings....I AM SO GUILTY of this! What I have come to realize is that sometimes going with my emotions can get me in trouble or make matters worse. Lately I have been teling myself to "chill out" when I am feeling extra emotional about things and I talk to God about it. Thank you for blogging about this, so needed!

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  5. I so greatly thank you and appreciate you for this blog entry! I've recently had the realization/revelation that I can be emotionally led, and it really is an 'intentional' fight to keep them under control... But I thank God for the power of God's Word, the Holy Spirit, and blog entries like yours which reinforce pouring out to Christ and reminding me of the power I have over my emotions! *telling my emotions SHUT UP!*

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  6. This was such a great blog Heather! I struggle with this area all the time! I took your advice about getting books on areas you sturggle with and yesterday I bought "Living Beyong Your Feelings" by Joyce Meyer

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  7. Ladies, if any of you utilize the Bible app (also known as YouVersion), there is a monthly plan titled "Holy Emotions - Biblical Responses to Every Challenge." I began this reading plan at the start of June, and I also encouraged my circle of friends to read it as well, because I know that many of us struggle with our emotions. It is extremely pertinent to this subject matter, and even though I've only just begun, it has helped me put some things into perspective and redirect my focus to what God wants me to concern myself with as opposed to being dominated by my emotions. Check it out!

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    1. Thanks I will definitely look into that!

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    2. Thanks for that info Brandie. I use that app but I haven't seen that plan. I'll definitely search for that. It is much needed. Be blessed!

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  8. Thank you Heather...I enjoyed and received this entire message. Thank you for allowing God to use and lead you!

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  9. Thank you, Heather for this post! As the ladies said above, this post is right on time!

    I have a question though: For Tip #2, what exactly would be a REAL REASON to be upset? Can you give us some examples, please?

    Thanks! xoxox

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  10. Thank you for being so real and transparent, much needed!

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  11. This is real! Learning to stop letting your emotions rule you is the best thing anyone could do, even though it's not easy at first. I have grown better at this and I know that God is helping me to get even better. As always, love this post.

    XO Kelley
    http://www.keepsittingpretty.blogspot.com

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  12. Thank you!!! This is amazing. Definitely working on the above and seeking Him more and more each day. <3
    And @Brandie - thanks, girl! I'm about to take a look at that now. I have/love that app!

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  13. Thank You for this! Was JUST experiencing some kind of emotional foolery on JUST YESTERDAY (june5) and the love of my life caught some of it but diffused it instantly. I had no choice but to check myself and to really just "get over it"; I'm not where I want to be, but I'm better off than quite a few, so I have to be grateful for what I have, stay patient, continue to trust that God really does know WHEN I'm supposed to have WHAT I'm supposed to have added to me...nothing I can do about God's timing, but it's ALWAYS right on time!!

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  14. Wow....I read YouVersion's Joyce Meyer's daily devotional. There was a recent post regarding this exact topic at a moment when I needed it most. It's amazing how God can speak to you in so many different ways at the most opportune times in order to show you how He needs and wants you to grow. Your blog is awesome....definitely a blessing!!

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  15. ...this past weekend felt like the lowest point in my life...so I got emotional,went shopping,partied then crashed...crashed so hard it took God's voice for me to get out of bed and face my life...but then I realise something I crashed because I let my emotions rule me,make my decisions thn destroy me...then a day later I come on your blog and I find this.and those two days i spent in bed...hopeless...I made my pinky promise...sometimes u have to hit rock bottom before God can make changes in your life...

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  16. I know you have heard this already, but I can't express how on time this post was for me! I just got back in town from a rather difficult trip, and the enemy was really trying to attack my emotions. While praying for peace and the ability to continue to walk in love, I read this post. My sister,who knew what a difficult time I was having, actually sent me this post to read. When I told her that I had already read it, she said that God works faster than her and he knew that I would benefit from this blessed message. Thanks Heather for being obedient and sharing this with me. Love you much,God bless sis.

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  17. God Bless you !! I definitely needed to read this and I am grateful for the practical applications. I know this needs to be better and it can with time and Jesus. I have told people about your blog and pinkypromise it is so awesome and inspiring :)

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  18. I loveeeee this blog!!!! It is very helpful. It educates the mind like never before. Thanks Heather for being obedient to God's leading. Your obedience is helping others; like myself.

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  19. I wish I had read this when you posted it. I let my emotions get the best of me and lost a great man. I hope that with this new knowledge, we will be able to repair what was damaged. Speaking to God about it regularly.

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  20. Wow! I always think about y I feel how I feel but don't thunk to tell God and it really is such a release! Very enlightening. Love this stufffff

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  21. God is awesome.

    I had been trying to read this post as soon as you posted but was unable to access it. I tried again today successfully and it was confirmation of what God has recently put in my heart.

    God timing is right, he knows what he is doing.

    Thanks for posting and being a vehicle of God's purpose and will.

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  22. Thank you Heather & thank God for this post. I am reading all of your post at such a needed time in my life. It's not easy serving God at any age, especially when we are young. I have been an emotional wreck, & I've have used my bold and strong personality to manipulate situations and others to get my way. Looking into my own mirror I loved what I wanted to see but the feeling was different when God handed me His mirror and had me looking into it daily. I was a mess, they're parts of my life that still a mess, God started I know He will continue and finish.
    Thank you for always reminding & emphasizing the importance of willingly spending time with God and enjoying it.
    Nothing in life had made sense to me until I started listening & obeying God.

    Like you always say "God is crazy faithful"
    Thanks for being YOU and being an instrument in God's hand.
    -Tara A. <3 :-)

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  23. Today I will begin to tell my emotions to shut up. I have had a history of being overly emotional and making quick rash decisions based on my emotions, but no more. I am glad that I read this so now I know how to pray, apply the Word and seek God when I am emotional or feel like I could be headed in that direction.

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  24. I would just like to say that I just read this for a second time. And it seems like even though I read it before after you first wrote it, that it made sense to me but it didn't hit. I have to say this semester has been one of the most emotion-filled semesters I've had. The beginning of a year's worth of Graduate studies has been overwhelming. Every time I turn around there is something else that I need to do, but God has graced me to get through every obstacle and task that came up. Yet, I still found myself drowning in unnecessary emotion. It wasn't until a talk with one of my older sisters when she told me to check my emotions that I realized what was going on. Even though I knew better, and that I should be spending time with God I had slacked off. My problems seemed a lot bigger than they really were, and the fact that I didn't have anyone with potential to talk to was screaming at me. Thank you for this blog, it was very helpful and eye opening. Especially, the second time around. God Bless you!

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  25. I actually ran out the house 3 hrs ago because I felt like between my two small children, bipolar husband, and my overbearing in house mother in law somebody was gonna catch a shoe to the forehead. THANK U FOR THIS.

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  26. Hi heather I just wanna take the time out to praise God for you and the anointed calling and gift of ministry that's on your life. I just googled how to spend time with God cause that's what God is calling me to do and your blog was the first site to pop up little did i know that by clicking on your blog site i would get advice and answers on everything i been praying and asking God for. God is a God humor and Love.
    God bless you Heather you touched my life,encouraged and helped me :)

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