Monday, February 6, 2012

"My story: When I was Single"

(my single days-- 2007!)

Soo, a few of you have asked me about my story and although I've touched on it-- I've never blogged about it. So I want to tell you more about myself so you can understand my perspective when I talk about dating, courting and relationships. Let me be clear with you all.. I was a HOT mess when I was single. I'm not going to try to cover that up. You may hear my story now & say.. wow! She didn't believe in kissing before she got married-- so I'm sure she was always like that. ... Please. So here's my story.

So, I was adopted at the age of 5 months by a Caucasian family. My birth mother (who was mexican/german) and my father (who was african american) didn't think that my mother could get pregnant. Then.. while she was in college--she found out that she was pregnant. Thank God that she decided against abortion. She took the unselfish route & gave me an opportunity at life. So as soon as my birth mother gave birth to me, she gave me to a foster home right away. I know that had to be HARD for her. I couldn't imagine.

My foster mother didn't believe in fat babies, so she fed me 3 bottles a day--one for breakfast, lunch and dinner--so as a growing baby I cried! With all of my crying, she thought that I had Cerebral Palsy. Back then, (1982) they didn't have the tests they have now. There were two families that were looking to adopt me--but the foster family gave the African American family the first opportunity..because they were black. The African American family came to meet me and my foster family explained to them that I may have Cerebral Palsy because I cried all the time & because I was stiff. They passed on me & took an African American boy with severe allergies .. THEN, my mother & father came to look at me & said I WANT her! I don't care what's wrong with her! I will take her! My mother told me that when they called her she picked my older sister up, Kristi & danced with her in excitement. How amazing is that? I was adopted, set apart & chosen by a family. Makes me think of my relationship with Jesus. We were all LOST and without hope..and He died for us so that we may be adopted into His family. We are set apart as Christians. Chosen. Whew.
I wasn't the first child my parents adopted. I was actually number 10. I have 24 sisters and brothers ALL of different nationalities--my mother gave birth to only one of them. About 40% of my family has some type of physical or mental disability. (cystic fibrosis, down syndrome).When my mom was little, she lived across the street from an orphanage and she would visit there everyday and tell them that when she grows up--she's going to go back and adopt them all. .. amazing right??! What blows me away is that my parents always wanted to adopt the child that NOBODY else wanted & that the world rejected. What amazing, unconditional love. I DO want to highlight that my PARENTS are amazing. I was SO loved, so cared for, SO taken care of. I'm BLOWN away by the love they have for me. My father has passed away-- but my mother is still here & is STILL a huge ball of LOVE. I adore her & she's one of my best friends.

Jr high- High School

So I went to an all-white school and me and one other person were the only people of color. I felt so rejected. I never felt pretty enough. I would put super perms in my hair to make it straighter because I thought super meant straighter. I was on a full blown out mission.. to be beautiful. My nose seemed huge so I would dust brown eye shadow on the sides of my nose to make it appear smaller. I hated my "beauty" mark above my lip so I would try to cover it up with makeup. Guys didn't ask me out-- so when someone DID give me attention, I just settled for whoever because it felt good to be wanted.
I grew up in a Christan church. But personally, I didn't learn that I wasn't supposed to not have sex outside of marriage. The church was awesome with volunteering but I didn't learn how .. to live a life of pure worship to Jesus with my heart. My mama told me if I'm going to have sex-- get on birth control. So I did. So pretty  much, at this point-- I had soul ties, emotional and physical ties, was jealous, insecure, rejected & confused.

College

Here is where my hot-messness furthered. So now I'm in college and ALL these guys are giving me attention. It was super surprising to me because I had always viewed myself as ugly. I never hung out with African Americans so I thought that I had to "be like" them to get them to like me. Who knows what that meant? I honestly thought black women were mean. Dont' judge me. I grew up much differently. My mom had ALWAYS taught us that WE are all equal & our skin color has nothing to do with it... But some of the girls I met when I first went to college were SO mean to me for NO reason and I was so chipper & nice. lol. Nonetheless, I started getting my crew together & met a ton of friends from all races. I also learned that I cannot take a couple bad apples & generalize a whole race. (Hey, I was 17 at the time. What do you expect?)

I hated to be single. Dating guys gave me a feeling of completion. .. still wasn't a christian even though I "grew" up as one. I couldn't rock that title because I didn't live like it. I lived for myself & my emotions.

In college, I started dating this guy. Our relationship was a hot mess. This guy cheated on me with everything that moved. I stayed in the relationship because.. I "loved" him. Although I didn't know what love was. I didn't know the Author of Love, so thus--I couldn't give what I never knew or understood. The relationship was built on a foundation of self & lies. It was rough and very distracting. Then, we hit rock bottom. The relationship got really bad. So we broke up and I felt abandoned & lost. I knew if I jumped into another relationship that I would only make things worse & then continued to feel God tugging at my heart. I knew that HE wanted all of me. Even as a full blown sinner without Christ, I knew that Jesus had a plan for my life and that He talked to me. So, I went to a church service and I gave my life to Christ in 2003.. fo' real. I went to the Christian bible store & I looked at almost EVERY bible until I found one that I could read. -- I ended up purchasing the Students Life Application bible & I LOVED it. Then, I got a journal & a couple worship CD's.

Then, I started spending time with God every morning. Look, I aint' saying its right-- it's WRONG but even in my sin when I would stay the night with my new little boyfriends & I would still wake up, pray in the Holy Spirit, read my bible & study AND take my tail to church. It actually confused my ex boyfriends that I was so determined to go spend time with Jesus. lol. I STILL had date night with Jesus. I still counseled others. I still did all I knew to do as I was pressing towards Christ. I wasn't perfect. I was and AM a hot mess. I am so broken without Christ. I knew that God was changing me into His image & I had such a fire in my belly for Christ. This whole thing.. was a huge process for me.

Please hear me out.. MEN were a stronghold for me for YEARS. It was so hard for me NOT to be in a relationship. Even with my date nights with Jesus and everything.. I still struggled with being ok with being alone. I searched all over looking to place my value in people, things, money, purses & the way I looked and I came up EMPTY. In 2005 I read " I kissed Dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris & I heard about a story of a couple that waited to kiss until their wedding day & .. it's what I wanted. Even in the midst of not being a virgin & falling over & over.. I still wanted that deep down. I wanted to be valued and to be important to someone. I was tired of guys wanting to eventually have sex with me after "dating" for a few months. I wanted God's best but I just didn't know how to find it. I didn't know what it looked like. Throughout all of this time, the Lord was pulling on my heart.. "my daughter, dont' place your trust in humans, they are as frail as breath, don't go back into that room with your "boyfriend"--he hasn't paid the price for you-- I have", there's no profit in going back to that ex-- it's destructive." I would have dreams with my exes in the dreams where we'd be crashing into the water & drowning or I'd be attacked by demons after coming from their house in the dreams. It was crazy. God used EVERY avenue to show me.

Throughout this entire time, I continued to go to church, pray, study, read my bible.. etc. Then one day, I got SICK and tired of having one foot in the world & ONE foot in the kingdom of God. So I broke it off with my random. Was it hard? Well, yeah--but at this point, I had this relentless determination to live for Christ. I just knew that my CURRENT relationships at that time weren't God's best for my life. They were DITCHES and not bridges. GOD was pulling on my heart & I had no peace with them. I didn't know who I was going to marry but at that point it didn't matter. I would have RATHER been by  myself for 10 years then to date another random.

So I went to the Lord and said.. finally. Daddy, you are all I need. I'm so content in you. With tears in my eyes, I poured out to Him. All of my hurt, my pain, my soul ties, my sadness, my rejection, and fears. I laid them at His feet and from that day forward-- I started worshipping Jesus with my life.

I was still getting tested with randoms wanting to date me or go out with me. It was almost like an email blast when out when I got single so guys from ALL over started asking me out. I turned them all down. Nothing could compare to the wholeness... I finally found in Christ alone. After some time passed, and many more tests.. I met my now husband. He walked by me for 3 years at church and the most we said was "hello." Within 20 minutes of talking to each other--we knew that we had met our one-day spouses. There was no question. God's TIMING is PERFECT. I wasn't ready those 3 years.. I just wasn't. But when we met on January 4th 2009, it was the right TIME. Oddly enough, that very day--an ex reached out to me to "get together" but I turned him down. Thank God I did.

After a TON of developing EMOTIONALLY and after my husband going in & plucking out most of the crap that was in my heart from the past randoms--(like being spoiled, manipulating guys, being emotional, etc). He proposed to me 1 year after we started courting. 8 months later.. we got married and kissed for the first time on our wedding day.

                                   (on our honeymoon! :) 1 week after we got married)

This wasn't no fairytale. This was WORK. But the same work the Lord did in me.. He can and will do you in you. So don't give up. Not now, not ever. There was so many times were I felt so alone & so not valued--thinking that "no guy will ever value or respect me"--but I HAD FINALLY get whole & VALUE myself before I expected a man to. You have to understand-- the CARES of this world.. and the temptations will NEVER EVER EVER EVER outweigh God's goodness! HIS ways are perfect!! So let go of the LITTLE that is in your HAND and give your WHOLE life to HIM right now.

If I could scream from the rooftops & show you ANYTHING.. it's to STOP wasting your time. Granted, I still spent time with God through my mess but I didnt' have anyone TELLING me nothing. I was my OWN mentor & it was the blind leading the blind. I don't regret dating my exes. I regret wasting valuable time that could be spent giving my whole heart to Jesus as a single.

And if you haven't joined the pinky promise movement.. Join us. Check out my blog on it here. What is pinky promise? It's a promise to honor God with your body & your life. It was birthed just a couple weeks ago & there's over 1,000 people that joined the movement. Lets go! http://heatherllindsey.blogspot.com/2012/01/pinky-promise-no-randoms-bracelets-are.html


God loves you like crazy,

Heather Lindsey
(me & my best friends) :)

130 comments:

  1. This is awesome! Thank you for sharing this, Heather. It takes a lot to be so transparent and I thank God for using you to help us ladies out! My story is similar in the relationship aspect and I've learned a lot from you already.

    God bless and THANK YOU! <3
    #NoRandoms #PinkyPromise :)

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    1. Rikeshia Precious BaxterMarch 26, 2013 at 11:10 PM

      Amen!I agree!

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  2. Thank you so much for sharing this story! I love when people are completely honest with their testimony, and it bothers me when people feel like sexual/heart strongholds are not as serious at addictions to drugs, alcohol, etc.

    Before this month is over, I plan to blog more about my stronghold struggle with my intense desire to need the affection of a man, and how it led me down one wrong path after another.

    But big ups for this one Heather :-)

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  3. Thank you for keeping it real! Gods blessings on you and yours!! Elder Stephen Lewis.

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  4. Great post as we can/should all relate to. Too often we look for comfort/validation in man when seeking God first is all we ever needed so as we all live and learn as I have and will continue to do so is so great knowing God is always with us and will make a way out we simply need to seek Him ") God Bless You on your journey ..

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  5. Truly a beautiful testimony. I thank God for you and how you continually allow Him to use your life! Perpetual blessings!!

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  6. Heather...I am so thankful to God that you shared your testimony. Although I read your blogs and I've received countless measures of encouragement from you, this one impacted me the MOST. I admit that I judged the "book by its cover" and although I knew the Holy Spirit was speaking to me through you, I wasn't fully committing my heart to receiving it because I didn't feel that you "understood" me...that you could understand what it is like to be rejected, abandoned, unappreciated and to hold on tightly to the slightest measure of love you can find! Even more recently, I've convinced myself that I need to settle...that the idea of marriage and love with a root and center in Christ was not attainable for me. I didn't think that a woman with a past like mine could possibly be blessed with anything like this! For years, I've relived my mistakes over and over and convinced myself that I don't deserve better. Now, I understand that I do. My current situation has a huge hold on me and no matter how much I try to convince myself that I deserve better, I can't fathom it...I have the Student Life Application Bible and, ironically enough, I just started back reading it. It's amazing! Although I'm not where I need to be, I'm praying for complete healing, inside-out and that I make the right decision when accepting a mate. I know for me that I must start somewhere...so, I will start with my time with Jesus everyday and I have faith that things will continue to move forward from there. Again, thanks Heather! You're even more amazing than I imagined! Know that you've helped to save my life...save my SOUL and my very faith in God's ability to restore.

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  7. You are such a blessing, you have no idea! Seeds have been planted & my life is being changed. God has used you mightly :)

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  8. Your story is encouraging for those of us, who though we may have intended & tried our best, won't make it to the altar a virgin. I believe God is redeeming that in my so I love to learn the redemption stories of others! Maybe in a future posts you could write about intimacy w/your husband in light of intimacy w/others before him. I'm not married yet & though I know God can break all previous soul ties, I do wonder if flashbacks or other hold ups will come up when I finally do share that special covenant with my husband. I know it's a deeply personal issue, but your insight may be helpful for many! Thanks! Bless you.

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  9. Wow what an amazing story

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  10. Great story Heather. Thanks for sharing. You are definitely inspiring others with your transparency and testimony.

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  11. Thanks so much for sharing your story... I am in that very season of purging! I'm pouring all my past sins out before the Lord and allowing HIM to clean my inward parts! Glory to God!!! I'm even more encouraged to be steadfast and unshakable during the process, just by reading your testimony! You're such a beautiful woman of God! Continue to let HIM use you in a mighty way!! Blessings ~Dom

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  12. Thank you so much for sharing your story! As I come up on my 24th wedding anniversary this week I am also very thankful for my husband. WE werent always the greatest couple and it took a long time to get to where we are today. I so wish I had the strenght in Christ that I have now. Perhaps we wouldn't be together but this is the journey god planned for us. I pray everyday he will truly find Christ. Im sad that he's not there yet. But I will just keep praying and hope you will pray for us too.

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    1. Hi Lisa! I am praying for you honey! I agree with you in Jesus name that He will turn to Christ alone! Also, I highly recommend "Created to Be His HelpMeet by Debi Pearl"-- I really think that the book would encourage you. Keep pressing into Christ. He sees your honor.

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  13. i love this thanks so much for sharing your story

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  14. I feel like half of my life has just been told..
    As reading this, my eyes were filled with tears.
    Thank you for letting God use you. :'-)

    Praises to God!!

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  15. Thanks for being transparent, and allowing God to use your testimony to bless other young women struggling with similar issues. I have 2 young ladies in my church who I would love to let read your blog. Is it OK if I forward this to them in my weekly email to them? Bless you Heather.

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    1. Of course!! Thanks so much for sharing!! Bless you!!

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  16. Thank you for sharing your story Heather, you are an inspiration! I spent many years going from one random to the next until finally God said "NO MORE!!" I got my pinky promise bracelet over the weekend and I've been wearing it proudly!!! Two years random free and counting baby!!! There's no going back! I will GLADLY wait for God's timing:)

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  17. All I can say, Heather, is WOW!!! When I think of how many people your story will minister to.... WOW!!! Thank you for sharing and for being open about it. We can't really help others when we're not willing to share with them just how God delivered us and what He delivered us from. This testimony can help so many people! WOW!!! And thank you :)

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  18. Aloha Heather! What an inspirational story! I remember you from MSU and always thinking how beautiful you were. Many of us can relate to your testimony, having the opposite sex as a stronghold in our lives. Your story gives hope to those of us still waiting for someone, while trying to honor God in our singleness. Thanks (Mahalo) for sharing & blessings to you on your new and wonderful chapter in your life!!

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  19. Beautiful testimony!
    God is awesome, powerful, faithful.
    Thank you for sharing.
    God bless and keep you and your covenant.

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  20. That was such a beautiful testimony. I swear evrything you said is how I feel but I have yet to get pass my hot mess. Thank you for sharing and giving my hope not to give up.

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  21. Thx for being so candid...I'm reading this and I can't stop crying because I see my life in this article...I'll be 40 this year and the madness is stopping NOW!

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  22. Wow! What a beautiful story that I can really relate to! I cried when I read this. Your story has touched my heart! I have a great deal of faith but just reading all of what you wrote has given me hope not to give up on what I believe in, make sure I continue to shine and to always know that GOD is there for me every single moment that I blink even when I don't realize that He is. Give God all the Glory! It's so true...man and those randoms will always let you down so therefore, we have to give God our ALL not just bits and pieces of us. Give your WHOLE HEART to God and that is what I have done...for without Him, I am nothing. Since I learned to do that, I have seen my life transforming before my eyes and I know He is still working wonders for me and my purpose! Thank you so much Heather sharing your wonderful story. May God continue to shower blessing upon your life.

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  23. Wow! Thanks so much for sharing your testimony. It reminds me a lot of mine and my husbands... GOD KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT HE'S DOING EVEN WHEN WE DON'T. HE's SOOOO good! I love what He's doing through you. Keep up the great work. You're an inspiration! :-)

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  24. WOW! Such a beautiful soul nestled in His arms. Your testimony moves me and I can not wait to read your book when it comes out. We are blessed to have you, Heather!

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  25. Heather! Thank you so much for sharing! You're story is so encouraging and oh so familiar! You, your hubby and your ministry are in my prayers.

    Thank you for being about our Father's business!

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  26. AMAZING. !. it all seem too familiar

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  27. Heather....Words could never express how you have blessed my heart tonight. I can honestly say that our life situations are similiar. I cannot stop crying because I am hurting as I type, but I KNOW that GOD is a deliverer and he is an awesome friend. I know that the bible says don't be envious, but I want so badly to be able to have what u have one day. I'm 29 yrs old and I just want to be happy. Thank u, thank u, thank u so very much. My story is too long to write but just know that I know that this is not a coincidence that I just happen to come across ur blog, I don't know u, but somehow I feel that God allowed me to read ur story and find hope in my life.....I want Love and I want the love of God!! Thanks

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  28. Wow big sis! God continues to use You to speak to me! I love you so much MORE for sharing this testimony! It truly encouraged me! Thank God for your life Heather! God bless The Lindseys!

    All the best,
    Khabirah "Kay" ♥
    See you soon!

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  29. Heather thank you for sharing your story with the world. It is incredibly difficult to become so transparent. This was a beautiful testimony of God's undeniable love for us His children.

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  30. Heather, Thank you for sharing your inspiring story. I'm a 33 year old woman and I have walked faithfully with God for seven years. Last year, I got into a relationship that was sexual & felt like I destroyed all I had built for seven years! I am encouraged by your story & please pray for me as I start allover again. I am NOT young & I have a strong desire to get married. I know that what I most desparately need is God right now but I don't know how to get back to that place of my first Love. Your story has encouraged me that through hard work, I will overcome. Thank you so much. GOD BLESS YOU!

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    1. Praying for you. You will get back. Nothing cab take His love away. Allow God to love you and forgive you. <3

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    2. When we don't walk with God, a feeling of overwhelming guilt comes over us. That guilt prevents us from feeling worthy. You have to forgive yourself, because God has already forgiven you. Once you forgive yourself and come to the realization that you were forgiven way before you even sinned, you can allow God back into your life. I pray for you as I, too, have been in a similar situation.

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  31. LOVE this!!! Thank you for sharing your testimony. It blessed me so much reading this. God bless you!!! :)

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  32. Eva Feb 8, 2012
    TOTALLY AWESOME thank you thank you for taking a stand for Jesus not only girls make this mistake so do guys in relationships that God never intended for them. This has touch my heart and keep on winning souls for Jesus. God bless you!!!

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  33. You're an amazing woman. I remember when you were chosen by Aunt Linda & Uncle Bill. Such a blessing to all of us!! You have always been beautiful, inside and out.

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  34. I remember when you were chosen by Sunt Linda & Uncle Bill. Such a blessing to all of us! You were an adorable little girl and you are an amazing woman. You have always been beautiful, inside and out. Love you!

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  35. From the day I started following you on tweeter up until today, I have not once regretted it. Your so relateable, which is why God's using you to touch young women. Speaking to you brings tears because what you do is so special and I hope you know that, I hope all the success. Your story is my story, minus the adoption story. God working on you and your family so that you would be able to find each other is a testimony in itself. but from growing up not to see color, and a white school almost seemed like like a contradiction for me growing up. I'm Haitian and dominicana, which is basically blk with a few selected light skin and Spanish speakers in my family. most who thought they were white. I grew up in the Catholic church all my schooling was within the Catholic church. Self identity in growing up was a struggle. But in HS I decided I wasn't going to allow them to control the choice of words I used, label me anything under my name and I did the unthinkable. I befriended the very snotty white kids that didn't understand my cultures. But the attention was amazing. Luckily I had a boyfriend in HS who respected my virginity. But when I started college and became single -__- that's when it became a lot. I was lost in the physical and soulties were over the top. It was overwhelming all these mixed emotions. I found God last year and dedicated myself to the Lord this past November. I will be reborn again after February 16 my baptism. I haven't had many mentors and it takes a lot for me to look up to someone, bc I'm great and for me to see someone as a mentor their heart has to be amazing. And I thank God for bringing you into my life. You are a huge mentor and I respect and love 6 as if you were a sister. MAY GOD CONTINUE TO BLESS YOUR LIFE. thanks for sharing!

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  36. From the day I started following you on tweeter up until today, I have not once regretted it. Your so relateable, which is why God's using you to touch young women. Speaking to you brings tears because what you do is so special and I hope you know that, I hope all the success. Your story is my story, minus the adoption story. God working on you and your family so that you would be able to find each other is a testimony in itself. but from growing up not to see color, and a white school almost seemed like like a contradiction for me growing up. I'm Haitian and dominicana, which is basically blk with a few selected light skin and Spanish speakers in my family. most who thought they were white. I grew up in the Catholic church all my schooling was within the Catholic church. Self identity in growing up was a struggle. But in HS I decided I wasn't going to allow them to control the choice of words I used, label me anything under my name and I did the unthinkable. I befriended the very snotty white kids that didn't understand my cultures. But the attention was amazing. Luckily I had a boyfriend in HS who respected my virginity. But when I started college and became single -__- that's when it became a lot. I was lost in the physical and soulties were over the top. It was overwhelming all these mixed emotions. I found God last year and dedicated myself to the Lord this past November. I will be reborn again after February 16 my baptism. I haven't had many mentors and it takes a lot for me to look up to someone, bc I'm great and for me to see someone as a mentor their heart has to be amazing. And I thank God for bringing you into my life. You are a huge mentor and I respect and love 6 as if you were a sister. MAY GOD CONTINUE TO BLESS YOUR LIFE. thanks for sharing!

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  37. Wow. I am so encourage by your testimony!!!

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  38. You're testimony is so inspiring =)

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  39. The best part is the Lord meets you where your at, when everyone else is judging you and pointing out your issues, HE STILL WANTS THE BEST FOR YOU!!!! HE JUST WANTS YOU TO KEEP DRAWING CLOSER TO HIM!!! Jesus has a specific purpose for all of us and we just need to pray to find out our purpose. I feel like your purpose is to minister to the lost women that don't have the understanding that they already have the power. THIS IS AN AWESOME STORY. GOD IS JUST SO GOOD. YOUR TESTIMONY I AM SURE WILL HELP OTHERS UNDERSTANDING THEY ARE IMPORTANT, AND THEIR BODIES ARE TEMPLES TO GOD.. You can’t always explain everything in your life and just have to trust God blindly.

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    1. Thanx for saying that."trusting God blindly". I'm overwhelmed by hurt and dissapointments that so many negative thoughts come to mind and i yielded to those thoughts.I've lowered my standards regarding 'my Adam'. Lord have mercy on me. I will trust God blindly now regardless of my current sitiation. Thank you. Truely God will never leave nor forsake us. Glory be to God

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  40. Thank you for sharing this blog. I often struggle with this same issue. I really needed to hear someone else's story. Please keep me in your prayers

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  41. Wow...I loved how you shared your true trials and testimony, very inspirational. God Bless you!

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  42. THANK YOU! SOOOOO MUCH!!!

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  43. Thank you for sharing your story. It was truly inspiring and served as a strong impetus for self-reflection. I know it is time for me to change my attitude and views on dating if I am to honor God and enter into a spirit-filled and happy marriage.

    Thanks again.

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  44. What a beautiful ending,this story is what I needed to counteract my fears and doubts that I was having! You are truly a blessing! I pink promise!

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  45. You know whats amazing its 5:32am and i was just thinking about how I would never find the right man in my life.I was thinking about how cold my heart was and how my I needed to become spiritually stronger in my walk with God. I can completely relate to your story. I AM A HOT MESS LOL. But as I strolled down facebook I see your blog posted on the wall. God really wanted me to see what you had to say. Thank you for giving me some sense of hope. I really do want to become a virtuous women of God and I currently have one foot in the door and the other one is still holding on to the world. I pray that one day I'll get it right. Thank you for your testimony it has really brought me some insight. :)

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  46. This has turely bless me. Your story is so my life back in the day .
    I would have never thought that someone would have the same story I have. God is so awesome.You will bless many with your story. Thanks for sharing and opening your heart to the world . <3

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  47. i like the picture of you in your wedding dress. So pretty :)

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  48. Much good perfection blog, boa they postact.
    That the Sir our God comes to bless you still more.

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  49. Thanks so much for sharing your story! I just found your site today but I'm amazed at how drawn in I was to it. My story is pretty similar although I wasn't adopted. I'm an African-American woman of very mixed heritage and found it quite hard to fit in with my race all of my life. I always lived by, attending school with, and hung out with those of Caucasian and Latin American descent. With the length of my hair, glow of my skin, and sound of my voice, the African-American crowd always tagged me as being too white or "acting white." Whatever that means. It took me years to grow into who I am today, a strong, confident, follower of Christ. Through my relationship with God, He showed me that he made me the way I was so that I could reach and help women of any ethnicity and I'm proud to be doing that today. I will definitely be following your site from now on.

    Happy writing!
    Vonae Deyshawn
    www.myvirtueplace.com

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  50. This was so right on time with me! I am 19 years old and experiencing my first real break up, and it is hard! Your post opened my eyes! I thank God that He allowed you to share this!

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  51. HEATHER!!!!!!

    I feel like crying and smiling and so much all at once. This blog is WONDERFUL! I am soo encouraged by you being you in Him!!! I can relate to soOoO much you have shared and I am so pleased to hear CHRIST being glorifed and lifted on HIGH!

    THANK YOU for this blog. I found it through my friend, Dupes who quoted something you wrote and then I found myself clicking on so many more of your posts. Truely truely a blessing!! Continue, contintue, continue!!! Oh my goodness I am soo pleased!!! ahhhhhh Thank you Lord! I have finally found a blog I can come and read where I KNOW I shall be edified and ecouraged in my Spirit for more of HIM!!!!!!!!!!!

    Do you have a twitter account? I shall look round your blog to see, but whoooop, whooop! I am excited!!

    If you get a chance, check out my page.
    www.presentingnash.com & my Vblog also http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9snEedK23n8

    God Bless you!! REALLY excited to look into your blog!!!!! #TeamJesus #TeamNewBeginnings

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    1. lol! HEY love! You're soooooo sweet & so kind! I totally LOVE your energy! Praise God! And yes! I'm on twitter as @heatherllove! I look forward to connecting & praying for you sis! xo Heather

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  52. This is an awesome testimony, that I can so relate to. I got to a place where I was tired of going thru the same ole, same ole and told God I didnt care how long I had to be single and celibate. I would wait on the one He had for me. A man that would love God first and me second. Ladies, dont ever feel it's too late to honor God with your body. You can start today and I am a witness that God will bless your commitment and obedience.

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  53. Hi Heather. I remember you from college, but I didn't really know you. One of my friends from college turned me on to this page and your story is blessing my soul right now. I'm currently single and I have asked God a lot of questions on why I'm not married and blah blah blah. When my friend told me about this blog, a lot of questions has been answered. I'm still searching for more, but I have truly learned a lot from your testimony. Keep sharing what God has giving you. Thank you! God Bless!

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  54. This is such an inspiring story! Am running away from breaking up a relationship that's making my relationship with God such a struggle. But am encouraged and I know Gods plan for me is to live my life for him.

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  55. Thanks so much for your openness in your blogs. They have resonated with me in many different circumstances I've been in. I'm currently relearning GODs view of me and how to be content as a nearly single person. Gods used both twitter and now your blogs to help me heal and grow. Thank you again! We will meet in heaven one day :)
    Your Sister in Christ
    Janelle

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  56. omg!! you need to write a book. i wish i could talk or write you personally. but thank you so much!!! you've touched my heart <3

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  57. I came to your blog from your husbands n I'm just encouraged by what you both are doing! Taking time out to share your life with the world is really beautiful and I'm gonna bring as many people as I can here to read your posts....they are soooo REAL! I celebrate you!

    http://fountainflow-omoregee.blogspot.com

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  58. Love, Love, Love This! I'm sharing your testimony with the ministry I lead. www.facebook.com/ManFastPlan

    God Bless

    Melissa Ewell Miller

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  59. it is so awesome to finally hear someone go through the same thing i've been going through for years! i had been feeling like i will never get married, especially being 31 and having a 5 year old. i have felt a lot of the way you explained, rejected, thinking i'm only good enough to have sex with-not to date or marry. but i had finally decided to wait on God. it is soooo hard! and you are right, you won't stop being tempted. i bless God for your testimony because you have definitely given me a little bit more strength to trust God and stay holy before Him! thank you :)
    eb

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  60. Heather -

    Your story is extremely powerful and encouraging. Similar to you, I've grown up in a Christian and loving home and didn't make my dating mistakes until I hit college. Now 22, and still stumble into giving "Randoms" a dash of attention. It's definitely hard but Jesus always pulls me back and reminds me of WHO truly deserves my time, love, devoted attention & HEART.

    Thanks so much for sharing how messy we all are; especially within our dating relationships. Your story and movement is a blessing.

    - Ashlee Chu

    ashleechublog.com

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  61. OMG!!! I love the way God orders my steps. He led me right into this post. I really needed to hear that. I am just now establishing myself in a souled out relationship with Christ. I am just now grasping the feeling of His wholeness and His amazing love, yet there are those moments where I too wanna go back to entertain randoms that are being thrown at me and things like that. But after falling before, I can't fall again. But it is extremely hard sometimes. To work, work, work, and do more work for God but when it's over there's no one "special" to just chill with. But I know that the call that is on my life is far more greater than what my flesh vies for in a relationship in a man. I have some friends that tell me I should just date. Being a young college girl, they tell me to "enjoy life". But I know what God wants me to have, and this is not the time yet. He's still working on me. I still have to grow spiritually, emotionally, physically, etc. all of that before wanting to date my HUSBAND (the next serious relationship will be my husband). But your blog gave me more strength to continue to hold out and wait patiently while working for God. Thank you so much :) God bless you <3

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  62. How do I even start this process, I know you said we can not do it alone, I just do not know how to approach God

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    1. Hey love-- I recommend spending time with God daily ( I blogged about it)--that's a great first step. HE will lead you to cut off unhealthy relationships and lead your life. I also recommend a bible-based church! There, you'll meet a ton of imperfect believers that will pray for & encourage you.

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  63. I started following you yesterday on twitter. I randomly came across your page through someone elses... Your tweets spoke to me... This journal entry touched my spirit literally. I have been through so many randoms and Mr. Wrongs in my 29 years. I'm ashamed, I get angry, and I have repented but it helps to know that someone else went through it and came out on the other side... Keep letting God use you... I wish I could go on and on about what I have been through but I don't have the time to type about it right now... God bless you sister and keep speaking about where you have been and how God used you. You give me hope that God can turn this mess of I, into a makeover...

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  64. Thanks u for sharing this story about ur life and I'm going through the same thing right now in my life at the age of 23. I followed u back on twitter.

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  65. Thank you for sharing your story. I stumbled upon your blog from a facebook friend and I am so glad I did. Reading your posts has certainly encouraged me.


    I am defintely tired of the random men coming in and out of my life. I pray I find strength and contentment in God, and God alone.

    Thanks again for sharing your Godly wisdom,and I 120% support the NO Randoms Movement!

    God Bless

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  66. Thank you Heather...

    I found your story very inspiring and it gave me hope...

    I am going through a very tough phase in my life right now where I don't understand how after years of being faithful to God I feel lonely in every sense of the word. Never dated (still a virgin), don't have friends (even my Christian "friends" can't stand me) and don't have a strong bond with my relatives. To top it all of I was never able to establish a fulfilling connection with God... I kept hoping and praying, but now I am drained, exhausted, heartbroken and tired of having failed to achieve this...

    When I saw your facebook account, I got upset because you seemed to me like one of those have-it-all Christians that is very blessed because in your case obedience DID pay off... You seemed like just another "I-am-so-pure-and-better-then-the-rest-Christian and that's why I have it all"

    ALSO because God ONLY blesses those women who never really wanted or needed a man in the first place (waiting until marriage to kiss made you seem frigid and uninterested, like you can life without affection because it's easier for you)...lonely people always marry last (I see it all around me and it's frightening), those who desire and seek love the most can't find it. You’ll ONLY marry AFTER you understood that you want God more than anything else, have no desire for people, love, affection, attention, etc., just God. Honestly, I don’t know how and when I’ll ever get there… I really really really want to get married, I can’t help it… this desire won’t go away or decrease… and getting married feels tied to this precondition…

    And then I read your blog and life story and realized that you’re still human just like me, and had a heart’s desire just like me... that God did NOT ignore your desire for love…

    I have heard this before and no longer disagree, but many people have told me that my problem is that I'm religious. I no longer fight this claim, because I tried everything else... but I never meant to be religious, honestly from the bottom of my heart. I always thought that it would delight the Lord if I took His word seriously, yet somehow that makes me religious and keeps God at a distance...

    It's all my own stupid fault...it's my sin... like a Pharisee (see the confusion and struggle?)

    Thank you for showing me there is still hope... I hope...

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    1. Hey love! Wow! You do have a great struggle going on in your heart. I appreciate your honesty. I want you to know that God isn't overlooking your faitfulness towards Him. He just wants a relationship with YOU. No laws, no "formulas".. just a plain, fun, enjoyable relationship. Its funny that you think I have it all together, because I don't.. I'm so far from it..as you can see in this blog. I just want my heart to look like Gods and I want to love people the way He loves them. That is my only desire. All this "stuff" came afterward. God searches this earth for people that will live for Him so don't get mad at Him for not seeing your life come together like you think. God is still behind the scenes, working out everything for your GOOD. Show yourself friendly to others, dont' be critical, humble yourself, cast down stupid thoughts & make them obey Christ & just take each day.. day by day. I'm here for you sis & I'm praying for you. Read my post on here called "Lonely Days"-- I def had a TON of those days & everytime I got lonely.. I knew it was God calling me closer to HIM because I was spending more time in the world. So, roll your many cares on God-- He cares for you greatly & has a beautiful plan for your life. Dont' compare your life to others, it gives satan a foothold in your life. xoox Heather

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    2. Thank you for sharing your story Heather it makes me think about my boyfriend Anthony because GOD have sent him to me because before Anthony came along I had guys that treat me like crap got me thinking I don't deserve to have a great man I used to cry myself to sleep all the time asking myself What did I do to deserve this so I decide to stay celibate for 2 years I told myself that I'm gonna wait on the LORD to find me a good man of course it was hard for me because I keep saying to myself when is my turn to be in the relationship I have seen all of my friends that is married got kids in a relationship when it is my turn then in January I had found Anthony on Facebook I haven't see him in high school since we graduated 10 years ago so we have got in contact ever since then on April 26 of this year he told me that he loves me for who I am I got down on 1 knee and telling GOD thank you for sending Anthony to me I can't live without him I love my Anthony so much GOD is good all the time

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  67. Your not a hot mess you are a work in progress :) Thanks I was thoroughly blessed :)

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  68. I really enjoyed reading your blog, i was talking to a new friend i met yesterday and we were talking about how we should stay with and be committed to God and how we should preserve our bodies until God gives us the "ONE" and she told me about this blog and that I may like reading it and get deep understanding from it....AND I SURE DID lol. And now im sharing this blog to everyone one on facebook. Because you are like anyone else and im pretty sure young adults will look up to you, i know i am! :) Stay blessed!

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  69. Thank you!!! You have truly inspired me. I've been struggling with my past and trying to understand my future and what GOD wants for me. I feel so encourage right now, I just cannot explain. All I can say is Thank you!

    Tiffany Reed

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  70. I am soooo thankful that one of my best friends referred me to your blog! I cannot thank you enough for your testimony. It's easy to feel alone when going through trials/hardships, and your blog provided assurance that I'm not alone.

    I am inspired!

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  71. Heather,

    Echoing what everyone else has said, your story is my story, and millions of women's stories in this world. The impact you are making by sharing your testimony is HUGE. To God be the Glory for connecting your story to so many women and men who can relate, but want in their heart of hearts exactly what you wanted, a stronger, deeper, soulful relationship with God.
    What you're doing for people, especially women, is just confirming that we have to raise our self-worth, raise our standards, understand that we were "bought with a price" and that we are worth dying for - Jesus Christ already did it. Thank GOD that you listened and took heed to his word because now you are touching so many lives. God bless you and I wish you much success. THANK YOU, THANK YOU for sharing!!!

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  72. I cannot wait to share this with my 17year old and my sister! We are going to have to start a "study" around your blog! LOL

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  73. Heather!!! I dont know you personally but I absolutely LOVE you. You truly are my sister in Christ and Im so glad that He brought your ministry into my life. May His Blessings and Favor continue to follow you ALWAYS!

    -Brittney
    xoxoxo

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  74. HEATHER I JUST THANK GOD FOR YOU! YOU CAME AT THE PERFECT SEASON IN MY LIFE I HAVE A SIMILAR STORY WITH THE RANDOMS AND IM GOING THRU HEALING RITE NIW FROM MY PAST YOU HAVE TRULY INSPIRED ME AND I LOVE HOW YOU KEEP IT REEEEEEAAAAL YOOU ARE TRULY ANNOITED IM GOING TO START THE JOURBAL CHALLENGE ASAP AND REALLY SPEND TIME GETTING TO MY DADDY THANK YOU AND KEEP UP THE GREAT KINGDOM WORK AM A FAITHFUL FOLLOWER THANK YOU SIS IN CHRIST THANK YOU!

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  75. Heather,

    You led me to ask myself: have you given your all to Christ Jesus, who loves you so much and cares for you in all your highs and lows? Have you sometimes rationalized falling into lust instead of fleeing from the devil ...?

    Thank you sister for your ministry. Blessings!

    Vivian from California

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  76. Hey heather. I like this part " He walked by me for 3 years at church and the most we said was "hello." Within 20 minutes of talking to each other--we knew that we had met our one-day spouses. "
    I knew its him when i saw him in cell group 1year ago. There are too many "coincidences" that are God planned but things dont work out and he didint take any initiative to get to know me. There are so many girls who like him in church. Till now. Im still praying for patience that even at d end of d day,if it isnt him, God will still give me d best He thought i deserve. (:

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  77. Hey Heather,

    I wanted to ask how you told your husband about your past? How did he react to it? Was it something God had to work on him about?

    Thank you for allowing God to use you in such a tremendous way. You have been such a blessing to me!

    Praising God
    Michelle

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    1. I didn't tell my husband about my past and he didn't really tell me about his. For what? It was BEFORE we met one another. Our past didn't matter. WE were both changed people so our relationship started on day ONE with each other and that's all that mattered. Hope this helps. :)

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    2. Hi Heather,

      I wanted to know do you suggest all women when they meet their "Adam" that the both of them shouldn't discuss their pasts with one another? I'm a open person and when I FINALLY meet my "Adam" I would want to discuss our or my past if the topic were to come up because I was taught that when a women meet her "Adam/"the one" then no topic is not up for discussion becuase that'll be the one to love you unconditionally and accept you for who you are regardless of your past because your changed person and the past only made you into the person who they fell in love with. Please share your wisdom and opinion on this topic... Also, I thank God that your such a God-fearing women of God....

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  78. I can truly relate to your testimony. I'm grateful to read your testimony & find encouragement. I pray for you and your ministry. God bless you lady!

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  79. Everytime I read this it makes me cry. As a college student, I can totally relate to being in soul ties and not feeling complete. I'm not saved yet, but I do aspire to be one day soon. Thanks so much for sharing your story :) God bless you.

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  80. Wow!!! Thank you for sharing your story... g ths right on time with what i am going though..

    I just recently broke off a 4 year relationship.. Throughout that time I knew that it was not Gods Best for me but I stayed because I was comfortable....I believed the enemies that I could not find the right one.. I didn't want to be alone... It was so hard for me to call it off but i knew that God had someone else for me... My family.. friends.... including his family wanted us to marry and apart of me stayed because it was expected of me to marry him... so the day before valentines day i had a dream that i married him and died and went to heaven and my right husbands was there saying if only you would have waited a little while longer... (Now i really understand Juanita Bynums song - I don't mind waiting)
    When i woke up I knew what had to be done...

    Since the break up I have been working on building my relationship with God first... Seeking him FIRST.. and i know all those others things will follow.... From time to time i struggle with trying to figure out who, how , when God will bring the one.. but i have to continue to build up my Relationship with him....

    This blog is a reminder for me that its Gods timeing and not mine...

    Sooo....I am so grateful for pinkypromise movement and it keeps me encouraged..... I actually found out about it on instagram.

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  81. Hi Heather! Just stopping through for more encouragement (reading this once again) lol I know its an old post, but it still speaks volumes to me as a young single Christian woman! Love yoooouuuss!

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  82. God is so awesome!! It makes my heart feel so full reading your testimony.

    I do have a suggestion about a possible blog post or podcast. You stated, "After a TON of developing EMOTIONALLY and after my husband going in & plucking out most of the crap that was in my heart from the past randoms--(like being spoiled, manipulating guys, being emotional, etc)." Could you discuss how you developed emotionally? I am a newlywed and we are both growing Christians and I know that I am very spoiled, manipulative, and emotional. I don't want to be like that but neither of us now the right way to handle it. I would love to hear how Cornelius dealt with it.

    Thanks!!!

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  83. I NEVER knew your story...and NOW I know why I am so drawn and attached to you!!!! Granted I am only 19, you and I both share a lot of the same life experiences...I thank God for people like you!!! I don't have to make the same mistakes :) I could cry reading this, it is such a burst of encouragement!! My boyfriend and I have made the step to not kissing before marriage and I have been taking the steps to running towards CHRIST!! I NOW want to be apart of the Pinky Promise movement #Wisconsin :)

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    1. ahh! I LOVE IT! WELCOME aboard sis!! Thanks for sharing your story! Continue to be on fire for God. He loves you SO much!
      Blessings to you!

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  84. Heather you have nooo idea how much this means too me! Thank you :)

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  85. Heather, oh Heather!
    Am crying............ in the office! I am undone!
    You have gone and stolen my story. Only 2 things you left out: Am a single mother of one and have had 5 abortions and one miscarriage. HOT MESS.....so hot, only God could touch me.4 of my abortions were after salvation too! 3 of them with one guy.
    But God has called me and commissioned me (would you bliv it?)I was so messed up, not to mention broken!
    But by grace I have been clean for awhile now and have no plan of going back. I wish I could share my story so openly and just encourage someone that's struggling. The randoms keep trying but I have gone so far as to change my number.
    One thing I do know for sure, I will have a pure wedding.
    I have soooo much to say but two words suffice.....THANK YOU.

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  86. Thank you for being so transparent.

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  87. wow!!! i am so glad i decided to take a peek and read this lol. i can see myself believing some of these same lies, wondering if there is someone out there who will value me and love me for the person i am. what's funny is (i don't mean this in a snobby way) i always feel like the devil sends randoms on my path b/c i can always tell that out of the guys interested in me, none of them put God first in their lives, at least not how i do it. and they try to hold up this facade while they're with me, as if they're so dedicated which pisses me off at times cuz i want them to be more dedicated to God than they are to me, o/w i feel like i have to take charge of the family :( so thanks for the encouragement, i will def hang in there!!! :-)

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  88. So clearly I am just now learning about who you are and reading your blog. This is amazing. I grew up in the system. I can relate all the way to you on every angle. It is beautiful to see Christ do the amazing work he has in your life. It gives me great joy to see God's work at hand. Thank you for offering yourself for the Lord's work.

    With Godly Love <3

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  89. Wow Heather! You are so loving, gracious and encouraging!! My kinda woman!!:-) Be blessed. I love your spirit!

    Love In Christ,

    Zakiya Jenkins

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  90. What an awesome testimony and one that I can completely relate to. It's amazing that once you have the holy spirit and the gift of tongues it doesn't leave you. I remember living with my boyfriend at the time along with my two children from a previous marriage, knowing that I was walking in sin but whenever my children would get sick I would instantly go into prayer and pray in tongues over them.

    I always knew where my help came from. It's funny how the tables turn. I can remember my mom praying faithfully for me that the horrible relationship I was in would be broken off and now I am the one praying fervently for my daughter and the relationships she is choosing.

    Our Daddy is so faithful and just as he called me at his perfect timing so shall he with all three of my children.

    Thank you so much for sharing and I'm looking forward to reading some more of your post.

    Be Blessed,
    Audrey Ostoyic

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  91. Hi Heather you are truly amazing and it feels so good to see that someone has been in my shoes. I have wasted so much time on randoms that it's quite ridiculous. I am ready to fully commit my mind body and soul to my lord and savior Jesus Christ. Your story is just so inspirinkg and it shows that it can be done.

    I'm ready my sister...I'm readt..!

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  92. Amazing adoption story. God sets us up for his will and purpose. No wonder you have love his people so much.

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  93. ...encouraged each time I see someone who's willing to let God walk them through growth processes! So painful when people let excuses, fears and their pasts stop Jesus from bringing out the best in them! *sigh*
    Encouraging journey, Heather...may God continue causing you, your family and ministry to shine on!

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  94. Hi Heather!
    I'm so pleased blessed by what you have written. So many young girls go through what you have been through with feeling unloved, not feeling good enough, not feeling beautiful enough.
    I'm so happy that you had the courage to write this and share your story, as I know that it will continue to bless so many people.
    I just want to say that are think that you are a beautiful person both inside and out. I look at your pictures and wonder how you could ever have thought otherwise! Its awful what the enemy can use as a stronghold. But Jesus Christ made you free, and he who has been made free is free indeed!
    God will continue to use you for His glory. Watch this space, as he has much more in store for you!
    Congratulations on your wedding! xx

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  95. I praise God for your life Heather. I see so much of myself in your story, thank you for being so open. I feel like the blind leading the blind right now as I start a fresh in my relationship with Christ. My journey is just beginning and your blog is already giving me the strength and courage I need to move forward with Christ. God Bless you xxx

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  96. Thank you for your transparency Heather. We share a few similarities. I was adopted too, but not in a loving home. I experienced abuse; sexual, physical and mentally. I struggled with abandonment and self distrusting with young men. I didn't love myself so I was completely reckless with myself and even wanted to end my life. God bless you an others who got to experience a loving family. I grew up never feeling loved at all so my heart was broken and I began to build up a wall. Long story short I have been accepted and adopted by God and into His Kingdom. I have learned and grown to forgive those who have harmed me. It's only through His strength that allowed me to do so. I am in my early 30s and I am still dealing with some of my childhood which sometimes brings me into depression, but I learn to continue to worship and praise His name. Oh how hard it is for me, but I will press on no matter what. Thank you for not showing me that there is purpose in my pain and I will pray for the Lord to reveal to me what it is He wants me to do. Thank you.

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  97. Thanks for your transparency.

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  98. Thank you for sharing your story!!

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  99. The transparency and honesty in this blog. Wow, I am convicted to continue to pursue after God more and more. I am not content with where I am. I want more of him everyday.

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  100. This is so encouraging! Thank you!!! :)

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  101. One year down i wanna come andsay thankyou so much thisis really encouraging. Be blessed i have seen this kind of struggle affects most people so lets keep praying for everyone going through these struggle that theywill emerge winner for me. i was tired of dating unsaved guys and my biggest prayer was i want to walk down the aisle to some one who is born again. and God fulfilled that prayer three months ago.. got married in nov and i am lovign it and thanking God for it everyday

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  102. Heather, you story is touching and inspiring, but it does not mentor to those who have been single for years upon years. You had boyfriends before your one year of singleness. A lot of us have not had boyfriends at all, and its hard for me to believe that you can understand what it feels like for us who have LIVED being single, while you have only EXPERIENCED it for a year so. I can imagine many people being ok with being single for the amount of time you were as oppose to others who have done it for yearS.

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    1. Honestly, I think the issue here is that we constantly compare & contrast our portions to others & try to belittle the process. We must understand that we are single for a reason & that at the right TIME, God brings our spouses. This has nothing to do with comparing & contrasting how "long" so & so was single or not. God is much more concerned about your purpose than changing your last name. I encourage you to be content & learn to enjoy Christ during this season vs. compare. xoxo

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  103. God bless you for sharing this. It totally related to your story because I travelled down that road too. I have shared this with my younger sisters so that they can be all the wiser than I was.

    Thank you so much Heather, and I ask God to thank you on our behalf.

    Remain blessed.

    Love always

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  104. Thank you ive been bound by sexual sin for years and too many heartbreaks to count i am questioning my walk with God as God is showing me stuff about my exes and foolishness even now i thought no man would want me and am trying to not b mean and controlling because no one loves me. But i know i am a jewel and some men will never b satisfied.i pray God will help me see myself in Him i am insecure about my biracial heritage bc women tend to judge and sterotype me and men too so i never thought i was beautiful. But i am learning to let go of the 'randoms' in my life and accept tge good things He has for me i know those good things dont include being abused. Thanks for your testimony.

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  105. All I can say is THANK YOU for your blog! It is helping me and many other women across the world! God bless! =-) Congrats on little baby Logan, he is adorable! (I follow you on Facebook as well =-)

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  106. I am so glad I found your blog. This is such a blessing! Reading your blog gets me excited about having a relationship with God. It is so awesome to see how God turned things around for you and it has all worked out for your good. It gives me hope that he is going to do great things for me too :-)
    - Arielle

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  107. Thank you Heather, this is an awesome story. You have touched so many lives, given so much encouragement and wisdom, to those who are and is going through what you have gone through. Keep on inspiring others in words and admiration. You spoke about me but I stopped dating I have been single for 18yrs. God is in control of my life, when the time is right for me to start dating he will let me know..

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  108. Heather, it is so encouraging hearing your story! I too want to share my story with others as a source of encouragement! This is inspirational stuff!

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  109. Thank you so much for sharing. Seeds have been planted in my heart by your testimony. I believe God will help me serve Him right. i lost my virginity at age 21, i am 23 now and i have never felt so lost and incomplete. I have told my "little" boyfriend that i hate the relationship cis ita pulling me away from God. At this point i dont care if i am single for the next 5years. I just want to do it right. I knoe God has a glorious plan for my life. Please pray for me.

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  110. What a great post! I'm happy I stumbled on to your blog last night. I'm 31 years old and have been single for 2 years. In those two years I didn't have a single date. No man asked me out! I figured it was the way The Lord wanted it be and from the moment of my ex and I broke up I have been deeply into his word. I have been spending every morning with my Lord for 2 years and it has been the best years of my life. I have failed a few times with sexual sin but I am sill a work in progress and still haven't lost my focus on Christ. Before I meet my ex, I prayed to God that he increase my faith and through my ex he did just that. Now I'm praying for husband whom I can share my faith with.

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