Sunday, November 27, 2011

For the SINGLE Woman


Thanksgiving just came & went and if you're around family.. they most likely asked you these questions: When are you getting married?! Have you met anyone?! Your clock is ticking...what about your ex? What happen to him.."

We all want to be loved. To be affirmed & cared for. For MOST women, they want to get married. Even if they tell you they don't, it's because they have been hurt in the past and they would rather be by themselves then to deal with some loser for the rest of their life. So they put this guard up. OR they've been dating their man for a while and in order to save face, they'll tell you they aren't ready because they are tired of him taking forever to propose to them. MOST women would jump at the chance to marry an amazing man that had a relationship with Jesus and standards. This is NOT a bad thing but I believe that God places this desire on the inside of every woman to be a help meet. Genesis 3:16- "Thy desire shall be to thy husband." That husband doesn't include your boyfriend or your friend with benefits. Sometimes, as women--we do anything to get a man to like us. We want to fill that empty void in our heart so we'll give gifts, cook, clean, be available, have a couple babies, give up sex, give money or anything else to get him to stay. If that MAN has no standards, he is only taking what you are willing to offer him. So our DESIRES will be to please our husbands--so if you are dating a random who hasn't become your husband and his desires don't line up with God's word.. then your desires may become polluted to match his.

I want to encourage each & every person reading these words to NEVER SETTLE! Don't keep playing house with a man that refuses to commit to you. HE has not paid the price for your body & your body belongs to Jesus, who died for YOU. Boyfriends don't get the same privileges as a husband--so do what you have to do but the more you place that man in the wrong position.. you will find yourself further & further away from fellowship with God. A man should NEVER take the place of God. "...You shall have no other gods before me." Exodus 20:3. You may think I'm being extreme by saying your man is your god or an idol. An idol can be anything we place ahead of God in our lives, anything that tugs at our heart more that God does, such as: possessions, careers, relationships, hobbies, sports, entertainment, goals, greed, addictions to alcohol/ drugs/ gambling/ pornography, etc. Unfortunately, God is often nowhere to be found as we zealously pursue our idols. Worse yet, the significant amount of time we often spend in these idolatrous pursuits, leaves us with little or no time to spend with the Lord. ..thus, our relationship with God dissolves & then all hell breaks loose & we turn away from the only ONE who can really help you. And His name is Jesus.

So don't get frustrated if you're only meeting a bunch of men that have no relationship with Jesus. Your standard will re-affirm to you that that PERSON is not the one. WE shouldn't be leading our men to Jesus, they should already have a relationship with HIM. How can they lead us--if they don't know how to lead themselves by hearing from the one & only LEADER. So set your time-calendar down and all of those dumb fantasies. Move all of the clutter away and stand before God, naked, honest, broken & ready to lay down your life for Him all over again. POUR out your heart to God & He will pour back into you.

HE is the only one that can make us whole. NOT a man, job, money, cars or anything else. I am screaming from the rooftops.. GOD wants your HEART. So stop giving it away to all of those people & things that constantly hurt you over & over again. God desires to heal every part of you. LET Him in for real & start now. When you start turning away these men that have no standards it will become CLEAR to you who really has a standard. Rest & trust God's timing. He holds your whole world in HIS hands. The MORE you spend time with GOD, the less you will focus on your circumstances & they will shrink down to nothing.

So I am praying for every woman and man that is desiring a mate. That they will get before God, exposed & honest as God uproots all of their pain & heals them from the inside out. That you will never, ever settle & that you will always trust God's timing. That you will run to God when you are lonely or down instead of running to a person's arms, that you'll stop comparing your life to others and rest in the truth that God created & woven you together in your mother's womb & set your days out before you were born. There will be a DAY that you'll meet your one-day mate. But your focus should never be that DAY. It should always be HIM. #Jesus. In Jesus name, Amen.


He loves you like crazy.

Love,
Heather

15 comments:

  1. SO very grateful I 'stumbled' upon this blog. Please keep sharing. Your words are truly uplifting and like a breath of fresh air. I thank God for your insight(s).

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  2. I too stumbled across this blog. God bless you my radiant sister!

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  3. This was encouraging a very great read for a single woman like myself, thanks so much!

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  4. thank u for this. this spoke to my heart on so many levels.

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  5. Thank you for writing this. There are a lot of us out here that need to hear this. People won't admit it at times, but it is true. You're a beautiful person and I know God has been blessing you due to your acts of obedience. God bless you both!

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  6. Thank you so much for your words of wisdom and encouragement. I have been on your blog for hours reading the goods news that God has for us and how to be set a part in a Godly relationship. Thank you for your transparency. I needed this word today!!!

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  7. Well said and thanks u for ur encouragement in this blog. I needed to read this.

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  8. "So our DESIRES will be to please our husbands--so if you are dating a random who hasn't become your husband and his desires don't line up with God's word.. then your desires may become polluted to match his." Powerful, thank God for this blog, it's really gonna change alot of young girls. Thank you Heather.

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  9. This was written just for me. I am 29 years old, have never really been in a relationship and by the Grace of God I am still a virgin. Sometimes I think God has forgotten about me and I used to get mad at God like why would you give me the desire to be a wife and a mother but it hasent happened yet. But the more I take my eyes off myself and put them on God, I have discovered I have been able to help so many people and lead so many to God through my singleness. I would have never been able to do, go or be who I am if I was married or had children, so I am greatful that God changed my perspective on my singleness and I am resting in Him that He is in control and knows just what I need and when I need it. I believe that I will be that wife and mother in His timing, not mine! Thanks Heather!

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  10. Thank you for allowing God to use you to minister to us!

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  11. WE shouldn't be leading our men to Jesus, they should already have a relationship with HIM. How can they lead us--if they don't know how to lead themselves by hearing from the one & only LEADER. That bit really touched me thanks for this post its really encouraging

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  12. Seriously though....

    God bless you. You have helped me in ways you can't imagine.
    I believe I will meet you someday, though am all the way in Africa
    You are my role model

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