Tuesday, June 30, 2015

"After Graduation & Feeling Purposeless?"

I recall taking an internship my junior year in college (2003) and I had just finished cooking for Jesus & having a "date night. with Him" I was single, focused & very intentional about spending time with God daily. So, as we watched a movie, He told me to turn to TV off. I grabbed a journal and the Lord began to download into my heart. He said,

"Heather, I have called you to preach my gospel. The Gospel of Jesus Christ. You and your one day husband will have a worldwide ministry and millions of people will come into the knowledge of who I am through your ministry. You will travel all over the world and don't be afraid because I will be with you."

I WAS SO EXCITED! The LORD FINALLY TOLD ME MY PURPOSE!! I had been asking Him EVERYDAY for like 6 months so I was thrilled when He made things to plain to me. I recall jumping up & telling my roommate who wasn't a believer! She didn't seem so thrilled & then the Lord told me that everybody isn't going to share in my joy & excitement but it doesn't change what He has called me to do. He also shared that He never told me to tell her. Lesson learned. :) Nonetheless, I felt like I had some type of direction for the first time in my life.


Then I sat there on my bed and thought, wait Lord. I have no ministry experience. I just got saved like 8-9 months ago. I have no parents or even family members in ministry. Wait, you sure that you called ME Lord? I mean, I'm a train wreck. I honestly felt so insufficient. I thought about my past where I chased down bad relationships. I thought about the boyfriend I barely broke up with 3 months ago. I thought about just not feeling enough.

Then, the Lord took me to:

Philippians 1:6
"And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns."

Galatians 3:3
How foolish can you be? After starting your Christian lives in the Spirit, why are you now trying to become perfect by your own human effort?

Then, He took me to Jeremiah 1:7 

…But the LORD said to me, "Do not say, 'I am a youth,' Because everywhere I send you, you shall go, And all that I command you, you shall speak. "Do not be afraid of them, For I am with you to deliver you," declares the LORD.  Then the LORD stretched out His hand and touched my mouth, and the LORD said to me, "Behold, I have put My words in your mouth.…"

I realized that if God started this work in me, He will complete it and why was I trying to perfect what HE said to do in my flesh RIGHT after HE told me to do it? THEN, like Jeremiah, I felt like I wasn't ENOUGH. I felt like I stared at all of my flaws and weaknesses and wondered WHY would God use ME? Then I heard a small still voice.. "Heather.. He will put the words in your mouth. He will show you what to do. He will lead you. Slow down and don't rush ahead of God." I realized that I will NEVER be enough in my own strength, power & ability. Its God that is going to have to finish what He started in me. 

So, I moved back to Michigan to finish school at Michigan State University and I was thrilled to only have 1 year left. I was ready to leave Michigan far behind and never look back because I felt like so much of my past was built up there. I wanted a new start in the Lord, a new beginning. So, in my senior year I began to pray about where the Lord wanted me to go and He told me New York. New York? Lord, I have no job, no connects, no nothing.

My graduation party from MSU! Left for NYC right after this photo!


I knew He was telling me to go. I packed up a enterprise van with as much stuff as I could fit and I made my way to New York. My best friend, Delan connected me with one of her friends from her hometown who needed a roommate and I moved in with 2 other girls to Spanish Harlem, NYC (around 118th street and 3rd ave). It's almost like if you think you're going to live for God and everything is going to be all pretty & perfect. Um no. No offense by any means to anyone living there but our area wasn't the safest area at that time. Hey, it was 2004, not sure what it's like now. Our building was run down, I saw a roach for the first time in my life on a regular basis, I saw mice, rats running around-- there was no central AC, lots of gun shots and I never felt totally comfortable living there.


In my NYC Apartment in 2004
God told me to be there. Talk about a season of STRETCHING! I just KNEW that the second I left college, God was going to lay out this perfect, orchestrated plan for my life where I had somewhere to live comfortably, a great paying job, wonderful friends and that perfect preaching husband. 

Psh. I lived where I was most uncomfortable, I worked for free at a job where God told me to tell people about Jesus, I had no friends in NYC, no church home yet (I searched like 20-30 churches) and I only had RANDOMS (men I knew I wouldn't marry but I was bored/lonely so I would hang out with them) pursuing me! I'm like, Lord-- I know you said I'm going to marry a man that preached the gospel but I'm not seeing what you TOLD ME!

I realized that God won't lay out my life on a perfect platter giving me step 1-100. Instead, He leads me with step 1. After I am obedient to what He told me to do, then He shows me step 2. If I ignore God and run from step 3 then I will stay at step 2 until I'm obedient to Him. Some people get stuck and stay at step 3 their whole life because they are afraid of step 3. Can I be honest? I was scared to not be obedient to the Lord. I was afraid of what was on the other side of my disobedience. I mean, I know you want to marry that man, but that man is HOLDING you back from doing what God called you to do. I know you want that job, but that job is keeping you in a state where you aren't supposed to be! I know, you want to please everybody but God never called you to that career! I know you want this or that but if it isn't what God wants for you, IT MUST DIE. 

Matthew 16:25
"For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.

Now, this isn't a pretty process. It's actually pretty ugly. God literally prunes you from the wrong mindsets, attitudes, relationships and crazy ways of thinking, This pruning doesn't FEEL good. This pruning includes YOU being honest with what God called you to do. Yes, you went to school and took out a bunch of loans to become an engineer because so & so was an engineer in your family. But you know for a fact that God has called you somewhere else. Listen, MONEY will never truly make you happy. It will become your SLAVE as you go into work and HATE your job. Then, you take your frustrations out on everybody else because you're in a job & doing something that you HATE in which.. GOD never told you to do.

I wanted to host TV. I pursued it. I actually got on a pretty big network. But it was MY idea. My plans. My thoughts. My vision. I thought I needed to "create" a platform for Jesus but I realized that God Himself can create the platform & then put me ON it.

 I don't have to go & try to do something & then tag God's name to it. After I stopped trying to tag God's name on everything, I actually let God take me through a process. A process of working at jobs that I wasn't crazy about but I KNEW God told me to go  there to develop in love, patience, character and integrity. Will I bend the rules and take the company car service home when I technically can.. but I shouldn't? Will I use all the ink to print my bible studies and hide it from my boss? Will I jump into gossip and join my co-workers when they cut up?

You won't "all the sudden" ARRIVE at your purpose. It actually takes you being intentional in waking up every morning and living for Jesus. Saying yes to Him and no to your flesh. You can't live any o'le kinda way and expect for the Lord to trust you with your calling! It takes great discipline! I'm not saying that you have to "earn" God because you cannot do that but what I am saying is that He has to be leading you. So, check your heart. Check out your life. Who is making the decisions in your life? Do you even talk to Him? Do you hear His voice? I did a blog on "How to Hear God's voice" and I encourage you to read it if you're struggling there!

Although I was working on Wall Street for a season in my life, I knew that God called called me to something great. I would talk to Him everyday and He would remind me that He has not forgotten about me and that He loves me. If I didn't talk to Him for long periods of time, I would start to feel purposeless. I realized that I needed constantly communication and fellowship
Met my now hubby while serving in those 5 ministries!
with the Holy Spirit to hold on to what God told me. And, while I was doing that I served in ministry. I served in over 5 ministries for about 6-7 years faithfully as a leader. I didn't quit when it got hard. I dealt with mean personalities. I dealt with christians talking behind my back. I went through this pruning process and everything I learned along the journey was NECESSARY for what I'm doing today. I am THANKFUL for the process, the hard times, the journey, the eating eggs every night for dinner because I couldn't afford anything else, the working for free, the volunteering, the whatever else because I was doing it as onto the Lord and NOT man.

Remember that it is GOD alone that placed PURPOSE in you and you will never be satisfied with what you're doing unless you are doing what HE has called YOU to do! For me, I loved helping women, reminding them of their worth, value and pointing them to the cross. It burned my heart to see women settle with the wrong men & to pursue anything outside of Jesus. I wanted to see them flourish in their relationship with God! I wanted to teach them to cook, dress cute & curl their hair so they would feel beautiful on the inside & the out. I didn't want to see them jealous or envious of one another! I wanted to see a generation of women rise up & actually support and push each other closer to Jesus! God used that to start Pinky Promise! What is He telling you to do? It may not happen right away, but it will! Has God called you to bake? Bake for your local church, for free! Has God called you to make modest clothes? Go find some budget fabric and make it work! Has God called you to be a Doctor? Study & show yourself approved and trust Him to use you to be a light!

So, hang in there. Whether you graduated or not, whether you've been searching for a job or looking for a career, slow down and let the Holy Spirit lead you. I saw bits & pieces of God using me over a 9 year time period before I stepped into ministry full time. You have a season and a time under the sun. Be faithful to God RIGHT where you are & let Him lead your path.

Just a few things:

1. Find my (4) books (including my NEW book, "The Runaway Bride"), purity rings, shirts & all that good stuff via pinkypromiseboutiques.com!

2. We have developed an APP! Think: daily post notifications + weekly devotionals, recipes and so much more! It's out NOW for iphones + Androids. Under: Heather & Cornelius Lindsey: Today With the Lindsey's

3.  If you live in Atlanta, I want to invite you to our church. Join us on Sundays at 11:00am at Landmark Midtown Art Cinemas. Our churches name is: "The Gathering Oasis"  931 Monroe Drive NE Atlanta, GA. 

4. Register for the 2016 Pinky Promise in Atlanta, GA! It sold out last year so you don't want to miss out! http://pinkypromise2016.eventbee.com

6. As always, you can join a Pinky Promise group locally! There's about 35,000 ladies that have joined! Find a group near you by joining & checking out the intro page! Join here: www.PinkyPromiseMovement.com

7. Pinky Promise is hosting a statewide baby shower for low income & single mamas in Atlanta, GA on September 12. If you want to donate or be a part of it, please email pinkypromisequestions@gmail.com For donations only, you can send the payment via PayPal to pinkypmovement@gmail.com & be sure to note that its for the Statewide Baby Shower. All donations are tax deductible. 

I love you all so much!
God loves you like crazy,
Heather Lindsey

Thursday, June 4, 2015

New Book: The Runaway Bride

Eeeek! I am THRILLED to announce my fourth book, "The Runaway Bride" is FINALLY here! This book is going to challenge you, convict you, make you cry, laugh and most importantly, push you closer to Jesus. After I preached "The Runaway Bride" at the 2014 Pinky Promise Conference, the Holy Spirit told me to follow the sermon with a book. I had no idea that for the next 9 months, God was going to wreck me, change me and restore me by showing me that I even run from Him in some areas.

You can find the book available NOW via a few avenues!

1. If you order it via my Pinky Promise Boutiques, for a limited time, I will sign the books BUT they won't ship until the week of June 15th! You can find the boutique HERE. 

2. You can order directly from my publisher HERE.

3. OR You can go on Kindle/Amazon & order HERE! 

P.S. I WILL be selling copies at the 2015 Pinky Promise Conference and I have a few scheduled book signings there as well!

I love you all and I'm thankful for your support!

Heather Lindsey

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

"Lord, Help Me to Be Content"

Gosh, what a dangerous prayer to pray.

And it seems like if you don't renew your mind in this area of being content with your season then it creeps back up around and you will look up and not even realize that.. you're discontent.

You may cry out to God and say.. "LORD! But... I thought I passed this test of contentment" and in all honesty, you did pass it at one point. But now you're experiencing tests, trials & different situations and you may find yourself simply complaining. Guess what, you passing those previous tests was wonderful, but now you're maturing and growing in Christ. There's a new level of contentment that you have to pass!

This blog was birthed from my OWN recent struggle. I'm 31 weeks pregnant (about 8 months) and I'm in the middle of finishing off the final edit of my new book coming out in less than a month, I'm planning our 2015 Pinky Promise Conference is next month & negotiating a contract for 2016, then, our statewide baby shower in September, marriage & single retreats, still running our Pinky Promise non-profit, I'm still trying to be a great wife, mother, friend, prepare for a new child and then the list goes on and on! On top of all of that, I started to get a few third trimester pains that really started to slow me down. I started to complain, I thought, "Gosh, Lord- must you pile all of this on me during the busiest time of my life?"

So, as I sat before the Lord in my quiet time yesterday, I started to complain and fuss as I prayed. Sounds crazy, right? Then, the Holy Spirit took me to Philippians 4:4 and I saw Paul write.. "always be full of the joy of the Lord." Of course, Lord-- you would take me to that scripture. But I couldn't stop reading that same line over and over again. It struck me like a ton of bricks.

First, let's break down the word always:
1. at all times; on all occasions.

Wait, so at all times, on all occasions, be full of the joy of the Lord?

Does that also include being 8 months pregnant and trying to do a bunch of things? Does that also include when tests and trials hit your life? Does that also include when you feel rejected, hurt, mad, frustrated, lonely, lost? Does that include when you lose your job? Does that include when your boyfriend leaves you and you had plans for marriage? Does that include when a loved one passes away? Does that include when you hate your job? Does that include when you feel ugly? Does that include when you get hurt by a friend or a family member?

Yes. At all times, on all occasions, be full of the joy of the Lord.

Talk about CONVICTION!

And to add to that fun conviction, Paul is in PRISON telling the church to be CONTENT and to find JOY in the midst of their situation. He's in prison. In a tiny little cell that I'm sure is dirty, with tons of insects, it smells, other prisoners are yelling, screaming and let's not even talk about the food. He may or may not have had a small window to look outside. He sat in the prison cell, day in and day out. Not even know when he was leaving. And, he's telling your comfortable self to be content. I cannot imagine what prison is like back in those times. Paul, like the other Apostles, were hated by most of the Jews because they openly and publicly taught that Jesus was the Son of God. The Jews thought this was blasphemy against God and were more than willing to throw someone in jail over the issue. Paul was in jail for about 5 1/2-6 years in total during the time he was on this earth-- all over sharing Christ! Paul was shipwrecked, snakebitten, stoned and eventually beheaded all for the gospel of Jesus! And THIS man is telling US to be content and AT all times, on ALL occasions, be FULL of the joy of the Lord!

This slapped me in the face and seriously challenged my heart. Paul detached from earthly things because the only thing that mattered what "CHRIST BEING WITH HIM." His mindset wasn't on getting a job promotion, on that next TV show that is debuting, or that concert. It wasn't on "when he was gonna find a wife (even though he had the gift of singleness, his focus was what mattered), it wasn't on some fleshly desire. It was on Christ. He knew that he could REALLY do "All things who Christ who strengthens Him" in Philippians 4:13 because Paul was focused not on what he "thought" he should have but on the task that Jesus gave him. Most people totally use that scripture out of context! They scream verse 13 while totally ignoring the scriptures before hand while they operate in their own strength, hoping God will fund their (not His) ideas.

Are you focused on the task that Jesus gave you or are you distracted by what you think you should have?

  • Lord, when is it my time for a husband? I'm tired of being single.
  • Lord, when is it my time for a job promotion? I hate this stupid job that I prayed for and I want more money for doing what I do. They don't appreciate my hard word and I have EARNED it Lord!
  • Lord, when is it my time to be debt free? I've been claiming debt freedom for 15 years and I'm still in debt and broke! (Honey, the same way you get outta debt is the way you got in it. Stop spending)
  • Lord, when is it my time to shine?! I want a stage! I want to see my purpose come to pass! My question to you is for what? For you or for Him?

I'm sure there was a lot of things that Paul "thought" he should have but He made a decision to shut up and encourage others in the Lord. And it wasn't positive thinking. His foundation was actually really trusting in the Lord and allowing for the Holy Spirit to fill His voids. 

What do you do when you are having a rough day? Do you run to an ex, food, porn, a friend or do you run to Christ? I get it, I get it, we all need outlets and times where we pull away but you better make sure that the Holy Spirit is giving you the ok to do what you're doing. Emotional eating, shopping, rushing back to your past or watching pornography will never satisfy you. It will only produce a greater lust in your heart to continue to use those things to temporarily put a bandaid on the issue. 

Isaiah 58:11 "..And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail."  

Ok, so if this scripture says that the Lord will guide and continually satisfy you, it tells me that most of are aren't giving Him a chance to satisfy our desires. We are too busy using our discontentment as an excuse to continue in our sin. And lets be honest and call it like it is, you just don't trust God to satisfy you. Trusting Him takes way too long  and if Jesus ain't moving fast enough, then you need to help Him out. I have learned that as the Lord guides us continually and leads us that our desires truly become HIS desires. I always say this and I will say it again, it's not that there's a shortage of good men, jobs, whatever else, there's just a storage of patient women that are willing to be developed by the Lord to actually go through the process of trusting Him.

This also goes for your marriage. Some of you are in your marriage and you are not content. You're sitting there dumbfounded because you thought that marriage would cure those feelings that you have but nothing your spouse does is good enough for you. You're just not content with him. Honestly, if you aren't content with him, you're not content with you. You are one flesh and you have brought the spirit of discontentment into your marriage. Instead of bashing him for what he's not doing, why don't you start appreciating him and thanking him for what he IS doing. Maybe he doesn't always take out the trash or clean up after himself. But, he goes to work, loves you, is faithful and he at least tries. Maybe, if he sees you taking out the trash, he will feel convicted and help you. For some reason, we have a hard time with 1 Peter 3:4 and that says that "we should win our husbands over with our quiet and gentle spirits." Let me translate in Heather terms: Shut up and stop nagging him for 10 minutes so the Holy Spirit can speak to him. Your husbands job is not to make you happy. Marriage is ministry and marriage is about serving one another and it's his job to love you like Christ loved the church. Jesus could care less about your happiness because your happiness is relative. It could make you happy to cheat on your spouse. It could make you happy to overeat. Jesus is much more concerned about your eternal salvation than you being led by your happy flesh feelings on this earth. So, it was on my heart in the midst of this blog to just say, "give your husband a break from all of that complaining." Build him up and pray for him like crazy. Speak up as the Holy Spirit leads you and be gracious in your tone.

So, how can one be content?

1. It's time to refocus, spend time with the Lord and really renew our minds concerning the things that are important to us. Search the scriptures on contentment and see what the bible says about it and ask yourself questions like, "have I ever been content? What does contentment mean to me?"

2. Identify open doors. If your void filler is shopping, maybe you need to delete the app that pops up every time there's a sale.  If your void filler is that ex, you need to erase and block his number so you aren't tempted to reach out. If it's overworking, you need to set boundaries and go home at a certain time to make sure that Christ is truly in the center of your life.

3. Admit it. It's time to be totally honest with ourselves and say, "I'm not content with my life and I compare myself to others, Lord help me." Don't push it under the rug & say, "no, that's not me, I'm good. I'm content." But deep down, you desire this things in the pit of your stomach and you constantly question God about those things. Contentment says, in all season, at all time, on all occasions, I will trust in you Lord. 

4. Recognize your problem areas. This goes back to #2. If you know that after a huge test, you want to "go to a bar, drink and get drunk", then you have to avoid those tempting situations. Don't just go and tell yourself that you're getting a "Cranberry drink." If your issue is sex, it's not the best idea to go up to his house or apartment if you know what happens when you do so.

5. Communicate daily to the Holy Spirit. Talk to Him throughout the day. Tell Him that you're not happy, vent, take moments where you just ask Him how He's doing. He's real! He's active and He's more real than the person sitting next to you.

Bonus: PRACTICE this contentment and remind yourself that God provides for you and that you have what you need. It's not going to happen overnight, especially if you have 15 years of discontentment.

You're NOT alone in this walk and satan is after your mindset concerning contentment! He wants you to think that God has forgotten about you and isn't for you. Instead, recognize that on this earth, we WILL experience tests and trials and these tests will develop things OUT of us that aren't like Him.

Just a few things:

1. Find my (3) books, purity rings, shirts & all that good stuff via pinkypromiseboutiques.com!

2. We have developed an APP! Think: daily post notifications + weekly devotionals, recipes and so much more! It's out NOW for iphones + Androids. Under: Heather & Cornelius Lindsey: Today With the Lindsey's

3.  If you live in Atlanta, I want to invite you to our church. Join us on Sundays at 11:00am at Landmark Midtown Art Cinemas. Our churches name is: "The Gathering Oasis"  931 Monroe Drive NE Atlanta, GA. 

4. Register for the 2015 Pinky Promise in Atlanta, GA! It sold out last year and it's 99%  sold out now, so you don't want to miss out! www.pinkypromiseconference.com 

6. As always, you can join a Pinky Promise group locally! There's about 35,000 ladies that have joined! Find a group near you by joining & checking out the intro page! Join here: www.PinkyPromiseMovement.com

7. Pinky Promise is hosting a statewide baby shower for low income & single mamas in Atlanta, GA on September 12. If you want to donate or be a part of it, please email pinkypromisequestions@gmail.com For donations only, you can send the payment via PayPal to pinkypmovement@gmail.com & be sure to note that its for the Statewide Baby Shower. All donations are tax deductible. 

Hang in there.
God loves you like crazy,

Love ya'll!
Heather Lindsey

A maternity photo! :) 8 more weeks to go!

Thursday, April 2, 2015

"Help, I'm Insecure"

**(Before we start reading, I was actually writing a chapter in my new book, "The Runaway Bride" and I titled the chapter "The Insecure Bride." I felt led by the Lord to share a snippet of the chapter with you. Note that this isn't the entire chapter, but you can find the rest of it on June 5, 2015 on this site when it goes live! :))**

One of satans biggest weapons is doubt. Satan loves for us to question who we are and how we measure up to others (Ephesians 2:1-2; Ephesians 6:12; 1 Samuel 16:7). He wants us to feel insecure over the meaning and purpose of our lives, where we’re going, and how we’ll get there. If Satan can get you to doubt God, then you don't think that He will use you. If satan can get you to doubt your looks, you will think that God spent less time on you and more time on another. If satan can get you to doubt your purpose, you will chase after money, get rich schemes and other things-- all distracting you from your main purpose. More than anything, if Satan can get you to doubt Gods love for you, you will quit on God all together.

I just exposed his plan. So now that you know that, lets fight BACK.

Have you ever felt insecure before? As women, I think its like a secret society where we pretend like we have it all together. We pretend like we are confident, we never compare our lives to anybody else, we always feel beautiful, we always have it all together. 

Let me tell you right now that its a lie. 

EVERY person on this earth has dealt with this area of insecurity. 

Including me. 

As you all know, I shared my story, "When I was Single"  and I grew up in a small town where I constantly compared my looks to everybody else looks. Social media and technology wasn't as popular so instead of comparing my life to a persons life on instagram, I compared my life to my classmates. It seems like they always got the guys and no guys from my school asked me out in elementary, middle school or even high school. I went to a predominately caucasian school and I honestly felt left out. 

Well, maybe if my hair was straight enough.. or if I was skinner.. or if I was this or that, maybe guys would like me.

I measured myself by a mirror called men. If they gave me attention, I ran with it and I felt good about myself. If I walked by a group of guys and they didn't give me attention, I would go home and feel rejected. Yes, it was that deep for me. Hey, I was 15, what do you expect?

Those insecurities didn't leave me when I got to college, it only worsened. Now, I'm on a campus with 45,000 students and ALL of the sudden, men are giving me attention. I look around and think.. "WHO are they looking at because there's NO way they are looking at me!" I CONSTANTLY looked at everybody else and compared my life to their life! I just wanted to feel enough. I just wanted to be enough. So, while in school my freshman year in college, I maxed out about 5 credit cards, buying clothes and makeup to make myself feel better about who I was. I figured that if I cannot fix this feeling on the inside, at least I can dress it up on the outside. I wore all of these clothes to fill this God-sized void in my heart that could ONLY be filled by God! 

How FRUSTRATING! Then, I jumped into a relationship with someone and what did I see in him? Nothing. He was older and he gave me attention. The attention I once craved when I watched little boys flirt with little girls when I was 10 years old. The 10 year old girl in me wanted so bad to feel secure in who I was so I acted out on my insecurity by dating a man that had no standards. I didn't know how I was supposed to be treated because my affection was hurt. "If you hurt me, it's ok. I'm ride or die. I will ride and die for you because I have no standards and I don't feel good about myself. I'm afraid that if you leave me, then I will be rejected and I don't like that feeling. I don't like being single because my security is in this relationship."

Thankfully, I found my way right out of that relationship and eventually gave my life to Jesus after a couple more dysfunctional, purposeless relationships. 

So now, I  KNOW better not to be insecure, right? I gave my life to Jesus, He washes my rejection, hurt and pain away and now I'm all the sudden "confident that He that started a work in me will complete it." - (Philippians 1:6) Psh, I wish. 

I have to be honest, I think some people from the outside looking in, think that for some reason that I have it all together. Like I don't have "ugly" moments, like I don't feel insecure in the calling of ministry, like I don't feel enough. Let me clear this up really quick so that you know you're not the only one. 

I have my moments where I feel absolutely not good enough, not pretty enough, like I didn't preach a sermon right, like I didn't write a blog right, like I didn't do this or that right. 

I want to highlight a few areas where I noticed insecurity hitting us the most as women. 

Let's look at the definition of insecure: to be insecure is to lack confidence or trust, whether in ourselves or someone else.

And to be totally honest and to call it what it is, insecurity is OUR failure to trust God. 

Jeremiah 17:7-8
New Living Translation (NLT)
 “But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence.
They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they never stop producing fruit.

When we are insecure, we are placing our CONFIDENCE and our hope in something ELSE other than Jesus Christ. SO of course this world is wandering around here insecure. Do you know that the plastic surgery business is a BILLION dollar industry? If you don't like it, let's change it to make you more "appealing" to society. You want to get women? Make money. Find ways to make a lot of money so you can attract women. Their hope and security is in looks, money and temporary things. 

So, the first area we are going to look at in regards to getting attacked with insecurity is our looks.

Your looks
In a world of photoshop, airbrush, youtube gurus who have crazy before & afters and whatever else, it may be hard to embrace who God called you to be. As I mentioned earlier, it started out with my looks but then it trickled into other areas where I used those areas to measure my security. Sadly, looks will fail you because they're built on a foundation called society. You may feel like your hair isn't curly enough, or straight enough, or you aren't light enough or dark enough. You may walk into a room with other single Christians and immediately start comparing yourself to them because.. you feel like you're not enough. Or, a guy at church may pass you over (And you REALLY liked him & thought you guys would court Gods way..) for one of your friends. Don't you DARE let insecurity rob you from knowing that God hasn't forgotten about you. God knows the desires of your heart and you lookin' at this fine man at church but God is looking at his HEART. He's saying' baby girl, he may look good to you but his will and purpose doesn't match yours. So, I'm going to protect you from this relationship. I'm going to keep you hidden so he doesn't even look at you. YOU may be thinking it's YOU He doesn't like but it's really God BLINDING his eyes from seeing your beauty. 
On TOP of God hiding you, one group of people MAY think your pretty while in another culture, they think you're unattractive. I recall meeting a family in an african country who told me that my husband was unhappy because he was skinny and I needed to feed him more. Whoa. Huh? In their country, the men and women were much larger because the larger you are, the more "prosperous" and happy you are. Huge change from America huh? 
Today, we must recognize that our looks ain't everything. You can have all the looks in the world and die tomorrow. Or, you could get into an accident and lose your looks. We must settle this truth that 
“And those who know Your name put their trust in You, for You, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek You” (Psalm 9:10). We must get back to our first love. Our real trust. And that's in Jesus. Our hope and our confidence is in Him, not some mans opinion of us.
So, remember that you are BEAUTIFULLY and wonderfully MADE by God. He makes NO mistakes and your value isn't found in a mans opinion. Settle this truth in your heart.

Lets look at another area where we are attacked, in our "status" or materials. 

Money & Possessions
I believe that the world gives us a false sense of security when it comes to things. So, if you accumulate a lot of things, you're blessed. If you don't have much, you are cursed. If you don't have the latest iPhone, newest car, biggest house, bank account or whatever else, then you're considered a failure. It's almost like whoever has the most toys wins in life and that's totally incorrect and not biblical. The bible is clear when it tells us not to put our hope in things on this earth but in God alone. 
1 Timothy 6:17
New Living Translation (NLT)
Teach those who are rich in this world not to be proud and not to trust in their money, which is so unreliable. Their trust should be in God, who richly gives us all we need for our enjoyment. 

I can assure you that money and things will bring insecurity to those who place their hope in them. 
This can go for college as well. You may be getting a ton of degrees to feel valued because you don't feel good about yourself, or you want to "prove" yourself to those who said you wouldn't be anything. What a terrible reason to get into debt! People bondage. Or, even you parents! (gasp!) We must be led by the Lord in our purpose and not others expectations. What if you weren't called to be a lawyer or a doctor? What if God called you to do something else? I know in some cultures, it's considered disrespectful to disobey your parents but I would rather feel some heat on this earth than to stand before God and be judged on an entire life of disobedience all because I wanted to place my earthly parents. If you're in this situation, pray and ask the Lord to change or move on your parents heart
 Matthew 10:37 - "If you love your father or mother more than you love me, you are not worthy of being mine; or if you love your son or daughter more than me, you are not worthy of being mine.  We must love God more than anything or anyone and in loving Him, we remain obedient to Him at all times. We are currently saving for our sons, Logan's "purpose" fund. Not an educational fund. If God doesn't call Him to college, why would we make him go? God may call him to preach. Or to do something else and we support what the Lord has called him to do. I know it's almost unheard of to walk by faith but this is why we have a bunch of people in positions and they are miserable. God aint' call you to that honey, it's time to get on your face & go to where He's telling YOU to go. 

Worrying about the Future
Another area I find that people struggle in and even my own life is being worried about the future. Oh God, what if I never get married? Oh God, what if I can't graduate, oh God, what if my husband divorces me like my dad divorced my mom? What am I going to eat tomorrow? Lord, I don't have any money! I thought you said you would take care of me? Lord, what if the guy I'm courting isn't a good leader, how can I trust him even though I know you showed me he is Gods best!
Matthew 6:31-34
“Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow.” 
This goes back to my point earlier, insecurity in God providing for you will cause you to doubt HIS provisions! If you doubt that God will provide for you, fear will grow in  your heart followed by no peace and eventually depression. You will begin to meditate on your situation or "what ifs" over, "Lord, you're faithful. I trust you. Show me what to do. Give me wisdom Lord.

Distractions of this world
Insecurity may also result from being preoccupied with the things of the world: “Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him” (1 John 2:15). Let's be clear, security is not to be found in this world’s people, things, or institutions, including government institutions. Some people become obsessed with having the right leaders in government, the right laws, and the right policies. When the government is in the wrong hands the nation is doomed. However, the Bible teaches us that God is in control and His sovereignty extends to governmental leaders (Proverbs 21:1; Daniel 2:21). While we should practice good citizenship and vote our conscience, we must also recognize that government policy cannot save us. Only God can do that (Isaiah 33:22; Psalm 143:6). 

Church Leaders, parents, boyfriends or husbands
Lastly, we can at times put our trust and hope in our pastors, parents (especially their bank accounts), boyfriends or husbands. We must understand that MAN can and WILL let you down. Our trust and foundation must be in Christ alone as HE is the only true foundation. “So this is what the Sovereign LORD says: ‘See, I lay a stone in Zion, a tested stone, a precious cornerstone for a sure foundation; the one who relies on it will never be stricken with panic’” (Isaiah 28:16). Jesus is the solid rock and our only hope of security (Matthew 7:24). So, insecurity CAN be birthed from placing all of our hope in the WRONG people and then when you get let down by them, you can began to charge other people like "everybody is the same." Even, (gasp) your husband. I love my husband, but he isn't my god. I look past him and I put my expectations in the Lord and trust Him. What if God forbid, something happened to my husband and all of my hope was in him? And don't let your hope be in your boyfriend who isn't interested in Christ. You will lower your standards because you don't feel good about yourself and do things that are on ungodly to keep this man. Your insecurities are setting your standards, not God. It's time to be free sis. 

These are just a few areas, but let's be real here, the reason for our insecurities is because we are focused on ourselves. We are too preoccupied about our life, our future, our money, our stuff, our looks and everything else. The bible warns against self-absorption and pride in Romans 12:3. Remember that GOD started this work in you and you HAVE to let Him COMPLETE IT! Pull out your scriptures, spend time with God daily, cut off crazy relationships and identify what areas in your life are birthing insecurities!  

True security comes when you recognize that “God will supply every need of yours according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19). When struggling with feelings of insecurity, never forget God’s promise: “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.” (Isaiah 26:3). So now, when I get tested, I remind myself that I will believe the best, and that God started and finished a work in YOU and that I trust Him. There's a battle going on in your mind and it's time to surrender that a battle and give it to the Lord. 

Just a few things:

1. Find my (3) books, purity rings, shirts & all that good stuff via pinkypromiseboutiques.com!

2. We have developed an APP! Think: daily post notifications + weekly devotionals, recipes and so much more! It's out NOW for iphones + Androids. Under Heather & Cornelius Lindsey: Today With the Lindsey's

3.  If you live in Atlanta, I want to invite you to our church. Join us on Sundays at 11:00am at Landmark Midtown Art Cinemas. Our churches name is: "The Gathering Oasis"  931 Monroe Drive NE Atlanta, GA. 

4. Register for the 2015 Pinky Promise in Atlanta, GA! It sold out last year and it's ALMOST sold out now, so you don't want to miss out! www.pinkypromiseconference.com 

6. As always, you can join a Pinky Promise group locally! There's about 33,000 ladies that have joined! Find a group near you by joining & checking out the intro page! Join here: www.PinkyPromiseMovement.com

7. Pinky Promise is hosting a statewide baby shower for low income & single mamas in Atlanta, GA on September 12. If you want to donate or be a part of it, please email pinkypromisequestions@gmail.com For donations only, you can send the payment via PayPal to pinkypmovement@gmail.com & be sure to note that its for the Statewide Baby Shower. All donations are tax deductible. 

8. I'm headed to California & VA/DC area in April. Check my calendar for event details!

God loves you like crazy,

Heather Lindsey

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